Episode 20 · The GaS Digital / Ray Kump Era
Complete the Trip
Nov 22, 2016 · 37:42 · 13 segments, 85 moments indexed
- 1 min
Cold Open: Tim's Late (Uber Driver Fight Teaser)
#Show opens with the hosts noting Tim is missing, apparently having a fight with an Uber driver, and will join as soon as possible.
2moments
- 0:10Tim Dillon Is Going To Hell.
- 0:43A fight with an Uber driver is teased, with the co-host noting it's probably Tim's fault.
- 2 min
Ray and Shannon discuss a weekend white-nationalist conference in DC where attendees reportedly gave Nazi salutes, and struggle to find news coverage of it, riffing on Trump-adjacent extremism.
6moments
- 1:09Tim asks Shannon if she watched the hate crime rally in DC over the weekend.
- 1:21The conference was a white supremacist think tank disguised with suits and respectability.
- 1:31Tim wants to pull up video of the Heil Hitler moment for listeners.
- 2:22The rally evolved into attendees giving the Zig Heil salute while saying Hail Trump and Hail America.
- 2:36Tim expresses surprise the story isn't bigger and questions whether websites have anti-Nazi filters.
- 2:53Tim suggests the story should have gotten more coverage by now.
- 3 min
Shannon's Type: Big Hulking (Possibly Steroid) Men
#Shannon describes her preference for large, muscular men like The Rock, leading into a riff about Staten Island tough guys and casual street violence.
8moments
- 2:59Tim asks Shannon if she's ever done a zig-howl, framing it as a ballsy move.
- 3:20Shannon recalls being on election day when people were crying in the studio, and she tried to calm them down by saying the outcome wouldn't be that catastrophic.
- 4:10Tim suggests Trump seems off-kilter based on the New York Times meeting story.
- 4:25Tim teases Shannon about her reading habits, implying she only reads muscle magazines.
- 4:40Shannon describes her ideal man's physical type: 6'2 to 6'4, very muscular, like The Rock.
- 5:13Tim sums up Shannon's preference as big hulking preferably Italian brutes.
- 5:24Shannon clarifies she lives around them on Staten Island, leading Tim to riff on Staten Island toughs and immigrant violence.
- 5:50Shannon mentions she's a bartender and has seen violence often in clubs in Barcelona.
Donald TrumpHillary ClintonThe Gethard ShowStaten IslandNew York TimesThe Rock
- 4 min
The Hypothetical Olive Garden Bodyguard Boyfriend
#An extended hypothetical builds out a scenario where Shannon's tough boyfriend defends her honor at an Olive Garden after a busboy bumps into them, escalating into stories about half-nelsons and violence.
9moments
- 6:03Getting the wrong look from someone can spark unnecessary conflict in certain neighborhoods.
- 6:19Tim describes a chain reaction of mania where one person's aggression spreads to others.
- 6:37Growing up in Bensonhurst meant you could get into trouble just for accidentally looking at someone's girlfriend.
- 7:02Making casual eye contact in the wrong place results in getting beaten and robbed.
- 7:41The guest tends to date larger, muscular men, most of whom have used steroids or enhancement drugs.
- 8:14A blind date setup with an average-sized, reasonable man prompts the guest to dismiss him as a scrawny rat.
- 8:53Tim's scenario: the average guy at Olive Garden needs to prove himself by violently defending her if someone bumps into her.
- 9:17The guest clarifies she'd want him to react if someone grabbed her ass, but only in that specific situation.
- 9:32She once dated a man who works in the prison system and put a guy in a half nelson during a night out.
BrooklynOlive GardenBensonhurstWilliamsburgBrownsvilleSuffolk County
- 1 min
The Suffolk County Jail: Keepers and the Kept
#Shannon talks about her time working at a jail between the morgue, sharing a co-worker's line about 'a thin line between the keeper and the kept,' leading into a discussion of the psychology of prison guards and cops.
3moments
- 10:06A thin line exists between the keeper and the kept, according to someone Tim knew at the jail.
- 10:34Tim argues that authority figures and cops are typically alpha males who like the idea of being above the law, citing studies on their psychology.
- 10:51These are not sweet people, Tim concludes about the officers he encountered.
- 6 min
Tim Nearly Fights His Uber Driver
#Tim arrives furious, recounting in detail how his Uber driver got in an accident, lost his phone, then accused Tim of stealing it, leading to a screaming match in the middle of the street.
10moments
- 11:06Tim nearly fought an Uber driver in the middle of the street after chasing him down
- 11:39He cancelled his show for a meeting that fell through, rearranged everything, then got stuck in traffic
- 12:01The Uber driver couldn't speak English and didn't communicate despite having the app with directions
- 12:16Driver hits a Jeep while merging into the Midtown Tunnel; both vehicles are trying to cut each other off
- 12:38Uber's routing sent the driver into the cash toll lane, forcing him to merge again before entering the tunnel
- 13:26After exiting, driver accuses Tim of stealing his phone that was mounted on the dashboard
- 13:48Tim starts kicking and hitting the driver's seat in rage, tanking his Uber rating
- 14:29Tim gets out of the car confronting the driver in his face while bleeding from his mouth after aggressive teeth brushing
- 14:53Tim screams at the driver in the middle of the street to complete the trip
- 16:00Tim argues the driver shouldn't accuse him of theft, then admits he used to steal Martinelli's juice from the food emporium
- 4 min
The Nazi Restaurant Rolf's and Julian Assange's Cat
#Tim rants about being denied a table at the German restaurant Rolf's over fire code rules, calling them Nazis, then pivots to discussing Julian Assange's disappearance and viral photo of his cat in a necktie.
10moments
- 16:54Tim's friend invites him to dinner at Rolf's, a German restaurant with Nazi-themed decorations.
- 17:14Calling the restaurant to make a reservation, Tim repeatedly says "Nazi Rolf's" and asks about seating for five.
- 17:34When told they can't pull up an extra chair for an 11-year-old, Tim threatens to stab someone in the face.
- 17:47The restaurant's explanation: fire code.
- 18:11Two guests scheduled for the show didn't show up; Tim hopes they both died.
- 18:52Tim tried to book a hacker on the show to discuss Julian Assange, who appears to be missing.
- 19:13Assange's cat is now wearing a necktie in photos.
- 19:43Zoom stomp ditches on Tim; the location in Glendale is too far away.
- 20:07Tim connects the Nazi restaurant to a recent conference, suggesting the critics might have a point.
- 20:21Tim claims a quote about Jews not being people is fabricated.
Rolf'sJulian Assange
- 3 min
Debating the Alt-Right, Trump, and White Victimhood
#The group debates whether alt-right figures are genuinely antisemitic, Trump's coded rhetoric, and mocks the idea of white people as an endangered group using Long Island as an example.
6moments
- 20:36Tim calls back a woman and takes her to a fancy restaurant decorated like FAO Schwartz during the holidays.
- 21:07Discussion turns to whether the alt-right guy actually hates Jews, given Trump's Orthodox Jewish daughter.
- 21:20Tim acknowledges the alt-right exists but notes their embrace of Trump wasn't unprecedented compared to Bush.
- 21:41Tim on the alt-right claim that white people are endangered: he grew up on Long Island where white people were fine even if they were dinosaurs when the meteor hit.
- 22:08He criticizes liberalism for portraying everybody as a victim and refuses to accept that white people are victims.
- 22:34Conversation shifts to a cat wearing a necktie, with speculation about who it belongs to and what it signifies.
- 2 min
Julian Assange's Cat and Pizzagate Paranoia
#More riffing on Assange's cat as image rehab, then a bit about a New York Times Pizzagate article and a joking 'lead' sending Twitter conspiracy theorists to Langley, Virginia.
6moments
- 23:48Tim explains that if you're accused of heinous crimes, putting a cat in a bow tie and cap helps rehabilitate your image because everyone loves cats.
- 24:14Dead man switch theory about Julian Assange's insurance files and hashtags being released.
- 24:27Tim claims the New York Times article about Pizzagate was definitely written by the CIA.
- 24:39Twitter users are trying to get Tim and Ray killed by pushing them to investigate Pizzagate in DC.
- 24:54Tim tells the conspiracy theorists to investigate the Finders organization in Langley, Virginia instead, mocking their fixation.
- 25:13Transition to Thanksgiving message about embracing differences.
- 2 min
Comedians Dreading Conservative Thanksgiving
#Tim riffs on comedians who dread going home to conservative families for Thanksgiving, joking about explaining low-level TV gigs like Seeso and Go90 to relatives.
4moments
- 25:24Comedians dreading going home to conservative families who are paying their rent
- 25:58Ciso is NBC's comedy network, though Tim admits not knowing where it actually is or if anyone watches it
- 26:17Money keeps getting dumped into new platforms like Go90 with no clear purpose or audience
- 26:40Tim remembers loving Thanksgiving at his grandfather's house in Brookville, Long Island
CISOgo 90Brookville
- 4 min
Grandpa's Wild Long Island Thanksgivings
#Tim tells an extended nostalgic story about his Irish grandfather's huge, boozy Thanksgiving parties in Brookville, Long Island, complete with singing, fights, uncle Tommy's cocaine use, and grandma's gork salad.
7moments
- 27:34Grandpa's house hosted 50 people for Thanksgiving with a full bar, pool table, and hired bartender.
- 28:21Uncle Tommy would show up around 11 PM on cocaine with his friends, already drinking and high.
- 28:52Grandmother would sing the Wabash Cannonball, then someone would get knocked out and fights would break out.
- 29:22By 3:30 AM people would make sandwiches with stuffing and cranberry sauce on bread.
- 30:04His other grandmother made gorka salad—cucumbers and vinegar—with turkey and weird German stuffing called filet.
- 30:51The filet was a huge meatloaf of bread, bacon, and egg served as their version of stuffing.
- 31:21She'd serve a dull fruit cup to everyone on nice crystal, trying to be fancy.
- 3 min
Building the 'Cult': Fan Army Branding Bit
#The hosts joke about needing a name for their fan base like other shows' 'Gomites' and 'Skanks,' pitching merch ideas including a pedophile-cult hat, then riff on JonBenét Ramsey and Colonel Sanders documentaries as holiday viewing.
8moments
- 32:26Tim pitches the show needs to operate like a cult, with listeners comprising a branded army.
- 32:42FBI listening disclaimer: they're using 'army' loosely, not militia.
- 33:18Tim wants to harness listeners as a collective and potentially make money off merchandise.
- 33:32Merch ideas include Ray's grandmother's gork and salad, and a hat.
- 33:48The hat would say 'Pedophile cults are real.'
- 34:18Bit about someone at Thanksgiving mentioning the Colonel, a head of a human trafficking ring, like a family relative.
- 34:36Tim speculates on the Colonel's personality—whether he'd be bombastic or quiet like a drunk grandpa in the corner.
- 34:47Tim guesses the Colonel would be articulate with good anecdotes.
O&ALewis C.K.
- 3 min
Tim jokes about being a worse guest than an infamous human trafficker before wrapping the show with upcoming tour dates in Schenectady, Red Eye, Vermont, and thanks to fans who came to Pittsfield, plus a plug for next week's anonymous hacker guest.
6moments
- 35:19Tim claims he can fill 20 minutes on air and kill, insisting he's a real ass dude despite doing things people may not approve of.
- 35:40The episode's theme was schizophrenia, with upcoming content planned for the new year including a WikiLeaks hacker.
- 36:14Tour dates: November 26th at Proctor's Theater in Schenectady, Red Eye appearance November 28th, and Vermont Comedy Club on November 30th.
- 36:40Tim thanks fans who attended the Pittsfield, Massachusetts show and announces plans for a live podcast.
- 36:55Asking listeners to subscribe, rate on iTunes, tweet, share on Reddit, and tell family about the show.
- 37:10When promoting the show to family, don't lead with the satanic child-fucking cult content; start with the Lou Pearlman episode instead.
WikiLeaksLou PearlmanRed EyeProctor's theaterVermont Comedy Club