Episode 413 · The Studio Revamp
President Lip Reading & The Real Emily In Paris | The Tim Dillon Show #413
Oct 19, 2024 · 1:04:30 · 550,000 views · 22 segments, 121 moments indexed
Tim examines dimensions of power, the Obama-Biden funeral meeting, Liam Payne, Doug Emhoff, a racist candle, Florida lovers gone awry and the reality of Emily in Paris
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- 1 min
Cold Open: Ethel Kennedy's Funeral and the Kennedy Curse
#Tim opens by covering Ethel Kennedy's death at a ripe old age, joking that dying of natural causes is unusual for the Kennedy family compared to plane crashes and skiing accidents.
2moments
- Ethel Kennedy's funeral at a ripe old age—a change of pace for the Kennedy family.
- Tim notes it's unusual for a Kennedy to avoid dying in a plane crash or skiing accident, suggesting the family curse might be lifting.
- 3 min
Biden, Obama, and the 25th Amendment That Never Came
#Tim describes the funeral gathering of Biden, Obama, and Clinton, recaps how Biden was pressured to step down over fitness concerns but was never actually removed from office, and questions why no one worries about his senility if he's still "running" the country. He riffs on not knowing where Ghislaine Maxwell really is.
6moments
- Tim describes Obama and Biden meeting at a cathedral, with Bill Clinton also present, which Tim casually identifies as a human trafficker.
- The New York Post hired a professional lip reader to decipher what Obama and Biden were saying to each other at the meeting.
- Tim explains that Obama and Pelosi pressured Biden to step down, threatening to invoke the 25th Amendment against him for being senile and unfit.
- Yet Biden was never actually removed from the presidency despite being deemed unfit to run, which Tim argues proves he's not really in charge.
- Tim questions the believability of Biden making real decisions in the Oval Office if people truly thought he was senile.
- Tim spirals into uncertainty about where various people actually are—Ghislaine Maxwell, Biden—and expresses skepticism about accepting official narratives on faith.
Barack ObamaJoe BidenBill ClintonKamala HarrisNancy PelosiGhislaine MaxwellCathedral of St Matthew the Apostle
- 3 min
Biden's Final Form: The Imp Who Knows What Was Done to Him
#Tim argues Biden knows exactly why he was pushed out in favor of Kamala and is now acting like a mischievous "imp," wearing Trump hats and jousting at rallies as a form of quiet revenge.
8moments
- Nobody really knows if Ghislaine Maxwell is actually in prison or on some secret CIA island.
- Tim discusses Biden's apparent signal to Obama that he doesn't want Kamala to win the election.
- Biden's attitude shift into an ornery, smirking version of himself — putting on Trump hats and showing pep in his step despite his age.
- Tim describes Biden as having become an imp in his final form, like he's still got life in him before the end.
- Biden knows exactly what was done to him and who did it, even if he's barely conscious most of the time.
- The power structure lost faith in Biden's ability to sell their agenda to the country, which is why he was pushed out.
- Biden understands the role he played and why the establishment wanted him replaced with Kamala Harris.
- The fascination here is that Biden, despite his condition, is conscious enough to comprehend the mechanics of his own removal.
- 6 min
Crime Families, Not Politics: The Invisible Dimension of Power
#Tim lays out his theory that American politics isn't really about ideology but a raw power struggle between warring crime families, with an invisible dimension of power (billionaires, intelligence agencies, corporations) controlling visible politicians, and ties this to his belief that the Trump assassination attempt involved a security stand-down.
6moments
- Tim argues that what's happening in the country is not political—it's a raw power struggle, and citizens casting ballots aren't actually participating in decisions about immigration, foreign wars, or the intelligence agencies.
- Think of the country as competing crime families rather than groups arguing about policies, and everything becomes immediately clear—like a switch was flipped.
- American history books by historians like David Halberstam and Doris Kearns Goodwin leave out an invisible dimension of power that hangs over everything.
- Many decisions made at the highest levels are decided by people you've never heard of, you didn't elect, and who aren't concerned with you.
- Tim believes the invisible dimension of power tried to assassinate Donald Trump in Pennsylvania by reducing Secret Service presence, not clearing rooftops, and allowing someone to shoot at the president.
- He acknowledges he could be wrong—the shooter could have been a random kid with no internet history who somehow walked around the rally, flew a drone, climbed an unslanted roof, and took the shot.
Donald TrumpDavid HalberstamDoris Kearns GoodwinAmerican political power structureDemocratsRepublicans
- 4 min
Lip-Reading the Obama-Biden Funeral Chat
#Tim presents a comedic fake lip-reading of Obama and Biden's conversation at the funeral, imagining them discussing whether to "shoot" Kamala and eyeing Clinton suspiciously.
8moments
- Clinton looks nervous in the freeze frame, sensing powerful people discussing hidden agendas at their level.
- Intelligence agencies function as muscle for billionaires, corporations, and military interests while controlling elected officials.
- Kennedy, Nixon, MLK, and RFK were killed when the invisible and visible dimensions of power fell out of sync.
- Joe Biden was too old to maintain the system; he got yanked, and now he's angry.
- With invisible and visible power completely misaligned, the situation becomes like Game of Thrones where everyone has their own agenda.
- Obama and Biden's funeral conversation, lip-read as discussing whether they can eliminate Harris as a political problem.
- Obama responds to Biden's assassination suggestion by saying they've already thought about it and Michelle brought it up at home.
- Clinton pretends to admire the organ to avoid acknowledging the violent conversation happening right next to him.
Joe BidenBarack ObamaDonald TrumpBill ClintonKennedyRichard NixonRobert F. KennedyMartin Luther King
- 1 min
Legally Obligated Joker 2 Review
#Tim reads a mock legal disclaimer/review praising Joker 2 sarcastically before revealing it's a joke.
1moment
- Tim reads a legally mandated disclaimer about his Joker 2 opinions, praising the film and everyone involved while claiming he's joking.
Joker 2Donald TrumpArthur Fleck
- 2 min
Tim reacts somberly to Liam Payne's death, reflecting that if a wealthy, good-looking boy band member can't find happiness, it doesn't bode well for anyone else.
5moments
- Tim expresses sadness about Liam Payne's death and refuses to make jokes about it, noting he had problems.
- The death highlights social media's destructive power — if a good-looking billionaire in a boy band can't be happy, what chance do the rest of us have.
- Tim argues that Payne's unhappiness despite every advantage means regular people are fundamentally screwed.
- Joker 2 had an 82% second week box office drop, the worst anyone's ever seen.
- Terrifier, a movie with a couple of comedian friends of Tim's in it, is outperforming Joker 2 at the box office.
Liam PayneJoker 2One DirectionTerrifier
- 1 min
Tim runs through news stats on Joker 2's disastrous second-weekend box office drop, comparing it unfavorably to Beetlejuice and the low-budget film Terrifier.
2moments
- Tim reacts to Joker 2's 37.8 million opening weekend as disastrous.
- The sequel dropped to just $7 million in its second weekend.
- 3 min
Doug Emhoff's Criminal Face
#Tim riffs extensively on Doug Emhoff's appearance, insisting his face looks like that of a purse-snatcher or shoplifter despite his goofy, non-threatening demeanor.
6moments
- Tim says Doug Emhoff's face suggests he's a scumbag who cuts off old women in traffic and steals from people.
- The look Emhoff presents—goofy and nonthreatening—is exactly the face of someone going through an elderly woman's purse.
- Tim describes Emhoff's clown-like face as hiding real darkness, something that makes your skin crawl.
- Politicians visiting restaurants like Waterburger is a whole outreach genre, but these places are death factories for the public.
- Waterburger is killing people; families watch their parents struggle with health problems caused by eating there at the end of their lives.
- Politicians should be calling out the poisoned food system, but instead Doug Emhoff the con artist is just ordering a combo meal.
- 4 min
Tim mocks the political tradition of candidates visiting unhealthy fast food chains like Whataburger for photo ops, arguing it's absurd that politicians promote junk food instead of criticizing it, and mocks Emhoff for removing the pickles from his order.
9moments
- Tim notes that all politicians—Trump included—show up at fast food chains for photo-ops at 'poison factories.'
- Whataburger isn't a treat; it's dinner three times a week for poor families with multiple children.
- Instead of pressuring these companies to improve ingredients, politicians show up acting like eating there is amazing.
- People respond to candidates eating fried greasy food because it makes them seem relatable; a farmers market visit would get them called elitist.
- Why not go to the Marlboro factory and light up—both are poison, and everyone already knows it.
- Doug Emhoff stands in Whataburger talking about voting as the essence of democracy and the essence of our country.
- Tim questions who would be swayed by Emhoff's Whataburger appearance to suddenly change their view of him.
- Adults don't substitute ingredients or leave things out when they order—you eat what comes, period.
- Emhoff, a 'philandering scumbag,' makes a poor Mexican worker in the back remake his order to leave out pickles.
Doug MahowaldWhataburgerBeto O'RourkeChick-fil-A
- 5 min
Tim reacts to a video of Doug Emhoff defining Yiddish terms with comedian Alex Edelman, questioning who this bizarre outreach is even for, and speculates about high-end Jewish voters secretly backing Trump over Israel policy, plus confusion over the AI-looking food in the video.
9moments
- Tim calls everyone from Beto O'Rourke to any Democrat running against Ted Cruz a bunch of losers who've lost every time.
- Alex Edelman posted a video from dinner at Doug Emhoff's home where they're asked to define Yiddish words.
- Tim questions who this video is targeted to and what the political aim of Doug Emhoff defining Yiddish terms actually is.
- High-end Jewish people Tim knows in LA and New York are voting for Trump over Israel concerns, but they're doing it quietly and staying closeted about it.
- Tim references Christopher Guest's "For Your Consideration" and compares this to a hypothetical where he'd invite people to define gay slang—saying the campaign should tone down the Jewishness instead.
- Tim mocks the campaign logic: "We're not doing great in swing states—what if Doug Emhoff defined Yiddish terms to reach working class whites?"
- Tim notices they appear to be eating Chinese food and asks what's happening in the photo.
- The food in the video looks AI-generated and fake, and Tim can't identify what Emhoff is eating.
- Something is visibly wrong with the food in their hands—it doesn't look real on closer inspection.
Doug EmhoffAlex EdelmanDonald TrumpChristopher GuestTed CruzBarry Ize
- 1 min
- 1 min
A sponsor read for Kalshi, the legal prediction market app, highlighting betting on the presidential election and other events.
3moments
- Kalshi is the first legal prediction market where you can bet on elections and trade on pretty much anything.
- Trump and Kamala are currently trading at about 50/50, meaning a bet on either would double your money if they win.
- Kalshi is the first legal exchange in the US to bet on these kinds of events, with election markets now live to trade.
- 1 min
Tim covers a news story about Bath & Body Works pulling a snowflake candle design that some claimed resembled a Klan hood, joking he now wants one as a collector's item.
3moments
- Tim expresses exhaustion with racism discourse and introduces the Bath & Body Works candle controversy
- Bath and Body Works pulled a winter-themed candle after backlash that its snowflake design resembled KKK hoods
- Tim wants to buy the candle now because it's become a collector's item
Bath and Body WorksKKK
- 5 min
Tim narrates a disturbing Florida news story about a woman who suffocated her boyfriend in a suitcase during a game of hide-and-seek while filming and laughing, then jokes about avoiding childish games like hide-and-seek in relationships.
9moments
- Woman suffocates boyfriend in suitcase during hide and seek in Florida
- Tim observes the people in Florida don't seem well
- Politicians don't care because residents are already killing each other in suitcases
- Sarah Boon arrested for suffocating boyfriend Jorge Torres in suitcase during drunk game of hide-and-seek
- Video shows Torres begging 'I can't breathe' while Boon yells 'for everything you've done to me'
- Tim speculates they probably didn't have a great relationship before the murder
- Tim questions why Torres agreed to get into the suitcase for hide and seek
- Playing hide and seek while dating is stupid because it's an easy way for someone to suffocate you
- Boon will spend life in prison telling everyone she suffocated her boyfriend and refused to let him out
Sarah BoonJorge TorresDoug EmhoffFloridaWaterburger
- 1 min
Tim discusses a news blurb about Baron Trump's personality at a dinner and speculates about whether he could be the one to carry on a Trump political dynasty, noting Americans tire of dynasties.
2moments
- Tim jokes that Baron Trump eats dinner with a gold spoon, not silver.
- Tim questions whether Baron will enter politics or if the Trump dynasty will continue beyond his father.
Baron TrumpdynastiesTrump DynastyNYU
- 1 min
Melania's Book and Tim's Own Upcoming Book
#Tim briefly mentions Melania Trump's new book and teases that his own book is coming, joking that he ghostwrote Melania's.
2moments
- Tim asks if Melania is around and what she's been doing lately.
- Tim announces his own book is coming out and tells someone to stop hassling him about it.
- 11 min
Tim dives into the controversy over Emily in Paris being criticized for depicting Rome and Paris as too clean, arguing entertainment is supposed to be aspirational escapism, not a mirror of urban decay, and mocks the hypocrisy of demanding realism from a TV show while not demanding it from government or media.
13moments
- Tim mocks the idea of being an Emily in Paris fan, joking that his friend's father loving the show means he must be gay.
- The core argument: entertainment is supposed to lie to you, not mirror reality back.
- Tim explains the fantasy premise—no marketing exec from Chicago actually gets to live a great life in Paris without danger.
- In the next 10 to 20 years, people will desperately crave fantasy and escapism as conditions worsen, not demand realism.
- Watching the trailer, Tim notes the show is marketing Paris from 1997, glamorous and white, not the actual city.
- Emily in Paris will never show the sociopolitical reality of wherever it's filmed—it's about an attractive woman falling in and out of love, not about the place.
- People pay for Netflix to escape the junkies and homeless they see daily; they don't want to see that reflected back on screen.
- Demanding realism from these shows means accepting depictions of mugging, robbery, and crime—is that how Emily in Paris should open?
- Stop craving your lives mirrored back to you; that's the opposite of what entertainment is.
- Emily in Paris is aspirational—the whole point is escape from humdrum reality, not depiction of mugging or sex slavery.
- The same people demanding realism from Emily in Paris don't demand it from government, news, or media—only entertainment.
- Instead of fixing the hellscape in actual cities, people now demand that TV shows showcase the problems to be 'realistic.'
- Society has given up on safe, orderly cities and now just asks why TV doesn't show the litter and crime that's really there.
Emily and ParisParisNetflixRomeTel AvivGiorgia MeloniChristiana Cavallo
- 2 min
A sponsor read for PrizePicks daily fantasy sports platform, covering flex plays, injury insurance, and specific player prop picks.
7moments
- PrizePicks offers up to 100x your money with as few as four correct picks across 30+ states.
- The platform includes injury insurance that keeps your lineup live if a player gets injured in the first half.
- Flex play feature lets you cash out and potentially double your money even if one pick doesn't hit.
- Community plays section shows entries from influencers and celebrities like Druski, Joe Button, and Shaun Ali.
- Withdrawals are processed fast and secure, with money arriving in as quick as 15 minutes.
- Taco Tuesday promotion discounts select player projections up to 25% each week.
- Tim's picks this week: Justin Jefferson over 83.5 receiving yards, Patrick Mahomes under 267, Tyreek Hill over 97, Saquon Barkley over 67 rush yards.
- 1 min
A sponsor read for Morgan & Morgan personal injury law firm, joking about enjoying car accidents now that he knows their fee-free-unless-they-win policy.
2moments
- Tim messes up the numbers for Morgan and Morgan offices and lawyers, correcting himself to a thousand lawyers and 100 offices.
- When covered in glass from an accident, Tim advises making sure you get yours, since the country is full of people getting theirs.
- 2 min
A sponsor read for Helix mattresses, including a joke about a bizarre Cold War geopolitics question appearing on the brand's sleep quiz.
7moments
- Helix mattresses are the best thing ever, with 20% off all orders in October.
- Tim claims he's honest about this mattress, unlike everything else he says.
- Helix delivers mattresses to your house after a quiz, so you don't have to run around a mall like a psychopath.
- The quiz accommodates all sleeping styles—side, back, hot sleeper, cool sleeper.
- One of the Helix sleep quiz questions asks "What is the role of nation states after the Cold War?"
- Tim says AI analyzes your essay response before moving to the next thing.
- Visit helixsleep.com/timd for the deal.
- 6 min
Closing Riff: The Unraveling System and Emily in Paris as the Coming Escape
#Tim returns to the fake Obama-Biden lip-read bit before pivoting into a closing meditation on America's power structure breaking down in the internet age, predicting escalating revelations (Epstein, Diddy, Clinton) and telling listeners they'll crave shows like Emily in Paris as an escape when things get worse.
10moments
- Tim does a bit as Obama and Biden discussing killing Ethel Kennedy at her funeral.
- Tim argues this moment in history is unique because people can now broadcast unverified claims on the internet before they can be censored, unlike when the CIA controlled mainstream media.
- The system is breaking down in front of everyone's eyes, and for the first time people have platforms to question the narratives instead of just swallowing them.
- Tim describes an all-out cold war among the most powerful people in the country—leaks about Epstein, Trump assassination attempts, questions about Diddy and Clinton's immunity.
- Powerful figures like Bill Clinton who enjoyed immunity for decades are now being discussed in connection with the Epstein plane and island.
- All of this damaging information is now out in the open in a way it has never been in American history—no library research required.
- Everyone can sense something is deeply wrong by reading body language and the way powerful people talk to each other.
- Tim pivots to Emily in Paris, claiming people will crave the show as escapism when chaos erupts.
- When everything pops off, you'll want Emily in Paris to watch while explosions happen outside your soundproof window.
- The next several weeks could be some of the most eventful in human history, or nothing happens—but something deeply wrong is clearly unfolding.
Bill ClintonEmily in ParisJoe BidenBarack ObamaDonald TrumpDiddyEthel Kennedy