rant · moment 4 of 17
Why The Show Is Leaving Austin
from #256 - The Announcement | The Tim Dillon Show · #256
15 min
Tim explains, mixing sincerity and exaggeration, why he's moving the show out of Austin after four months, tearing into the city's slacker culture, bad barbecue, bachelorette tourists, tech transplants, and the general vibe versus L.A., while Ben admits he hasn't told his wife yet.
- Tim moved to Austin because quarantine had warped everyone's minds and he needed something new, despite LA's problems.
- Austin felt like Brooklyn to him — fun but hipster-filled, small, and not a world-class city compared to where he'd lived.
- He says he was wrong; Austin is a city for failed artists who never made it in New York or LA, a culture of slackers.
- Joe Rogan wants to create a comedy hub here, but he's fighting against Austin's inherent slacker culture that's been around forever.
- Austin has many problems of Los Angeles — homeless people, a mass shooting last night with 13 injured, and a shooter still on the loose.
- He tried to get in a groove with the city but couldn't; he's only been downtown four or five times, and homeless people threw bottles at them.
- The comedy community of Austin consists of slugs — sloth-like losers to the bone whose stench of human failure infects the air.
- The food is terrible; only two places make good barbecue, and Franklin has a nine-hour line staffed by rude tattooed lesbians.
- Austin is the bachelorette capital of the South — drunk women and men with itchy trigger fingers shooting people on Sixth Street.
- The town has nothing to do with music; it's just heroin addicts occasionally playing melodies on the street after defecating.
- He tried playing pickleball and meeting tech people, some of whom looked dangerous and kept him on edge but that's exhausting now.
- He's had about enough; you can't even jump in the creek without a reservation, and he needs to work on Caitlyn Jenner's campaign in person.
- A mass shooting happened last night at the Vulcan Gas Company, the venue of the moment — it's time to go.
- Ben will have to fly in every week for the show while they suggested gaslighting Ben's wife into thinking she made them move.
- Downtown Austin is utter chaos and hell — seven square blocks where two of them are like Fallujah, with danger and violence.
- He's done with Austin; he's leaving and won't be going anywhere immediately, but the experiment is over.
- The quarantine was like an acid trip without taking acid, and now it's time to move on from this failed Austin chapter.
AustinJoe RoganDonald TrumpCaitlyn JennerLos AngelesSandra BullockMatthew McConaugheyMike JudgePuerto RicoPeter Schiff