rant · moment 18 of 23
Abolish the Olympics
from Trump Assassination Theories & The Bowels Of Power | The Tim Dillon Show #402 · #402
7 min
Tim argues the Paris Olympics have become a joyless security-state nightmare and that the Games themselves are boring now, proposing they be replaced with something more like gladiatorial combat.
- Paris Olympics have become unwatchable due to extreme security measures turning the city into a maximum security prison with gates and fences everywhere.
- Los Angeles will host the 2028 Olympics and will need similarly draconian security measures.
- Tim argues the Olympics should be abolished—they're boring, nobody cares anymore, and the concept of picking a different city every four years is stupid.
- Olympic athletes' lives are depressing: they live in cars, and many come from Appalachia with families addicted to fentanyl.
- Nobody even knows who the current Olympic stars are anymore, unlike when Tim was young and people cared about Olympic celebrities.
- Simone Biles is back competing after previously withdrawing, but Tim dismisses her and asks where are the Palestinian athletes.
- Tim proposes that Gaza should send a delegation to the opening ceremonies—just 200 random people screaming for help and water while news anchors pretend it's about the joy of competition.
- Tim used to love watching the Olympics with his father eating ice cream, remembering speed skaters with exotic names like Heyop O.
- Tim recalls trying to remember Olympic speed skater Hey Chavo and complains that people no longer know or care about Olympic athletes.
- Before non-binary terminology existed, there were lesbians who would ski, like supposedly Peekaboo Street, which Tim considers a wasted name if she wasn't lesbian.