rant · moment 7 of 16
Imaginary Long-Lost Migrant Family Showing Up at His Door
from Nugget Branding | The Tim Dillon Show #346 · #346
4 min
He does an extended imagined phone-call bit about long-lost relatives and 30 migrants showing up at his house, riffing on a freeloading friend who left pasta in his fridge, before returning to mock the priest's shelter announcement and comparing it to the church's history of abuse.
- Tim's imaginary scenario: a long-lost cousin shows up claiming to be family and wants to stay.
- The cousin arrives with 30 Central American migrants expecting to move in.
- They left plain pasta in the refrigerator with no sauce, just excess carbohydrates.
- A priest claims El Paso must live up to its reputation of welcoming migrants.
- Tim notes El Paso's actual reputation is Old El Paso salsa, not taking in migrants.
- Tim imagines the economic argument: bring migrants in to make salsa, seem more authentic, split the profits with the church.
- The priest pitches migrants as labor to handle household tasks and free up rich people for donations and abuse fund contributions.
- Tim questions why the priest isn't opening shelters for broke Americans in El Paso who've needed help for years.
- Tim challenges where the priest's energy for helping disadvantaged Black Americans is, suggesting it only appears when cameras are on.
El PasoOld El PasoFather Mark