Episode 516
Jane Doe, Russian Plague, & The Black Epstein | The Tim Dillon Show #516
Oct 10, 2026 · 1:07:50 · 1,087,233 views · 13 segments, 73 moments indexed
Tim discusses the global panic over news of a Russian Plague in Siberia, the Cornell 7 story becoming more complicated as leaked texts and phone calls resurface, Diddy’s life after prison, an attack on a plane full of Israeli passengers…
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- 2 min
Cold Open: Live from the Move Podcast Studio in Miami
#Tim opens from Miami's 'Move' podcast studio, riffing on the studio's name and joking about marriages needing space for passion projects like podcasting.
3moments
- Tim opens the show live from The Move podcast studio in Miami
- Tim explains the appeal of The Move studio: creators come here to say things and make money
- Successful marriages work best when they allow each other space to pursue their own passions
The MoveMiami
- 9 min
Tim discusses the Russian pneumonic plague outbreak in Siberia, Daria Chapova's lab accident, and argues governments should stop manipulating viruses into bioweapons since there are already plenty of other killing methods, tying it back to COVID origins and grant money incentives.
10moments
- Siberian pneumonic plague is contained—better in cold, low-density Siberia than China's wet markets and crowded cities.
- Researcher Daria Chapova broke a test tube of plague bacteria and fell ill, a scenario straight out of a disaster movie.
- Tim expects only two or three deaths and dismisses apocalypse theories—people won't escape this easy with a plague; they'll live through more suffering.
- Governments should stop manipulating viruses into bioweapons and focus on curing existing diseases instead of resurrecting historical pathogens.
- Biowarfare is unnecessary when nuclear weapons, drones, AI, and robots already provide countless ways to kill each other.
- Countries won't abandon bioweapons because they believe traditional militaries are now ineffective against drone warfare, making engineered pathogens seem like the solution.
- COVID emerged from gain-of-function research on bat coronaviruses designed to appear terrifying enough to justify government research funding.
- Annie Jacobson wrote about biowarfare, nukes, and aliens in a book with a stripper-voice delivery; she included Tim, fulfilling his childhood dream of appearing in a biowarfare book.
- Tim remains optimistic that Russia will contain the outbreak, convinced it won't cause a pandemic despite indicators the pathogen resists antibiotics.
- The leaked bioweapon killed a couple of scientists quickly, but Tim believes Russia has it under control and expects the situation to fade away.
biowarfareAnnie JacobsonDaria ChapovaVladimir PutinChinaSiberia
- 1 min
Tim reads an ad for Neuro Gum, touting its focus-boosting ingredients and offering a discount code.
2moments
- Episode is brought to you by Neuro, maker of the world's first smart sour mints with natural green tea, caffeine, and L-theanine for calm focus.
- Tim notes he doesn't feel the need to apologize to his body afterwards because there's no sugar, no aspartame, and no crash.
- 11 min
Tim dives into the Cornell fraternity gang-rape scandal, reading leaked texts between the accused and the accuser that complicate the narrative, riffing on his own blood test results, wishing his hypothetical children weren't involved, and discussing the 'Asian in the gang rape' angle.
10moments
- Tim on the Cornell 7 scandal: everyone involved are degenerates, and he's supporting all sides of the case.
- Frat guys texting "there's a woman in the room, everybody come see" is not gentlemanly—nobody would be proud if these were their sons.
- Tim wouldn't want any of these people as his children, despite not having kids or a family, and would be upset if his cat went to Cornell and was involved in a gang situation.
- The texts show loser behavior and scumbag conduct that should not be celebrated, though drugs and alcohol complicate memory of events.
- Narrative confusion emerges: the case was initially thought clear-cut, but the leaked texts suggest something weirder and more ambiguous than expected.
- Her recollection of the event may have changed—either from embarrassment or from realizing she hadn't consented to certain acts.
- One participant, Jonathan, didn't even have her number before the encounter, which Tim compares to how gay married couples sometimes don't have each other's contact info.
- Jonathan's apology text admits he and Matt felt like shit for being too fucked up to shut things down before it got out of hand.
- Her response text calls it a gang bang and says "our body, our choice"—which Tim argues essentially ends the rape narrative.
- Tim says the text exchanges seem to end the idea it was forcible rape, though people will argue she's traumatized and still processing what happened.
- 11 min
Tim plays and reacts to leaked phone calls between Jane Doe, Winston Lee, and Matthew Engles from the Cornell case, catching Lee in lies, then riffs on Amy Poehler's Giggly Squad podcast and pitches a bit where he and Poehler dress as Holmes and Watson to investigate the Cornell frat houses.
10moments
- Tim jokes he'd want his children to be Asian, then expresses disappointment that one of the Cornell 7 accused assailants was Asian.
- He watches Giggly Squad and admits female podcasts he dismissed are actually funny, including Amy Poehler's show.
- Tim describes Amy Poehler's podcast as boringly peaceful—guests discussing water preferences and favorite colors instead of substantive topics.
- He pitches the idea of Amy Poehler having the Cornell 7 accused on her show, asking softball questions about sparkling versus still water.
- Winston Lee is caught lying on a recorded call—the Snapchat thread explicitly referenced 'whip it out,' contradicting his denial.
- Tim proposes a crossover fantasy: he and Amy Poehler dress as Sherlock Holmes and Watson, investigate Cornell frat houses as a miniseries.
- School systems in France are in revolt as Tim pivots to discussing the Cornell investigation phone calls.
- Matthew Engles denies Jane Doe's account of her intoxication, claiming she said she was sober and hadn't been anywhere.
- Engles suggests both their memories might be inaccurate, yet he had posted a photo of Jane Doe in bed with an invitation saying 'Boys, come whip it out.'
- Cornell expelled Engles and another student; Tim notes the situation suggests potential civil and criminal liability.
Winston LeeCornellMatthew EnglesJane DoeTom HollandAmy PolarGiggly SquadBero
- 1 min
Tim reads a Car Shield ad about roadside assistance and freezing repair costs amid inflation.
2moments
- Tim describes being stranded on the road after factory warranty expired during the Obama administration, then getting hit with a $300 out-of-pocket fee for a mechanic to tell him the problem is three miles away.
- Inflation is eating into everyone's budget, and an unexpected car breakdown could ruin your entire month.
CarShield
- 1 min
Tim reads a Neutrafol hair growth supplement ad, mentioning formulas for men and women and a discount code.
3moments
- Neutrafol is the number one dermatologist-recommended hair growth supplement brand, used by dermatologists themselves.
- Tim reads that Neutrafol offers different formulas for men and women at any stage of life, with an upgraded women's formula that's vegan, biotin-free, and comes in smaller capsules.
- Subscription saves up to 20% and includes perks like free Headspace membership, claiming results—thicker, stronger, faster-growing hair with less shedding—in three to six months.
- 11 min
Tim discusses Diddy's return to public life after his sentence, his privileged treatment in Fort Dix prison including paid inmates and massages, and draws parallels to Jeffrey Epstein's trafficking operation, arguing both men were protected by powerful clients and that the full scope of these networks never gets fully exposed.
11moments
- Tim explains why Diddy deserves to get out of prison and have another era of his life, comparing him to Epstein.
- Diddy would bring people over, have group sex, then shoot one of them in the leg for entertainment with his sons.
- Tim characterizes Diddy as a fun character and criticizes the country for losing people like that.
- Every human trafficker loves a massage because running trafficking operations is stressful.
- Human trafficking is a client services business, a high-end concierge lifestyle business like anything else.
- Tim argues Diddy got a sweetheart deal because higher-level people protect trafficking rings connected to powerful figures.
- Both Diddy and Epstein cases follow the same pattern: narrow the inquiry to avoid embarrassing A-list people, then give sweetheart deals or the person ends up dead.
- When Diddy gets out, he'll hire top-tier PR people to spin a narrative that all activity was consensual.
- People forget about scandals or reframe them much faster now due to constant phone stimulation and information overload.
- The Epstein case became framed as a political scandal once Democrats thought Trump was implicated, obscuring its true global significance.
- Epstein represents unknown powerful people operating behind the scenes with access to everyone but no official role or known source of wealth.
DiddyJeffrey Epsteinhuman traffickingRosie O'DonnellDonald TrumpJohn Luke Brunell
- 3 min
Tim covers Polymarket odds on Democrats sweeping the midterms, then mocks Ken Paxton's appearance versus the 'elfish' appeal of his opponent Terico, comparing political attractiveness trends to past 'rat-faced men' crazes.
5moments
- Polymarket odds on the midterms: 64% Democrats take Senate, 91% take House.
- Terico sits at 61% to beat Ken Paxton, who people like because he has an elfish quality.
- Voters increasingly prefer candidates based on their resemblance to fantasy archetypes rather than policy.
- Ken Paxton looks like a piece of shit, with one eye positioned wrongly on his face.
- Paxton resembles a drunk medieval beggar, whereas Terico is a fun elf people actually want to support.
Ken PaxtonTericoPoly Market
- 1 min
- 1 min
Tim reads an ad for Morgan & Morgan personal injury law firm, including an anecdote about a friend who fell at Wendy's.
2moments
- Tim describes friends wronged by private persons and institutions who needed to "get theirs" through legal action.
- Friend fell in a Wendy's and now owns a house with a lazy river.
- 5 min
Tim discusses the foiled terror attack on a Fly Dubai flight to Tel Aviv by a co-pilot, predicts the Ellison family will turn it into a movie, and mocks how quickly NBC cut off JD Vance's commentary on the incident.
4moments
- Pakistani co-pilot on a Dubai-to-Tel Aviv flight stabbed the pilot, Israeli special forces stormed the cockpit and landed the plane.
- Tim predicts the Ellisons have already put this hijacking attempt into film development after merging Paramount and Warner Brothers.
- Captain described being suddenly hit with an axe after his colleague said he was going to pray and stepped behind him.
- JD Vance gets cut off mid-sentence by NBC News while making a point about airline security, treated with no respect despite being vice president.
- 12 min
Israeli Fatalism, San Diego False Flags, and Trump's Guttural Cult
#Tim riffs on Israelis' normalized relationship with terror and bunkers, pivots to speculation that Trump might fake-nuke San Diego or Los Angeles, argues false flags no longer work because nobody would believe them, and plays Trump's 'let him take out Los Angeles' clip to dissect the cult-like unthinking devotion of his supporters.
11moments
- Israeli citizens are always ready to do something, living a maniacal lifestyle adapted to constant threat.
- Israelis time air raid sirens so they can finish dinner before the check arrives and they run to bunkers.
- The 'Let's Roll' cockpit storming on 9/11 is probably fake; nobody believes it actually happened.
- When the government says they're going to kill them all, Israelis respond with enthusiasm because they're already living in constant fear of hijackings.
- People think Trump is going to bomb San Diego and blame it on Iran to start a war.
- False flags might not work anymore because nobody would believe the government even if they staged an attack.
- The government used to murder citizens to manufacture consent for war, but now they don't even bother with that pretense.
- There's a strange comfort in the idea that the government might nuke San Diego because it would mean they care about us at all.
- Trump has been saying an Iran war is almost over for months while suggesting letting them take out American cities, and his supporters clap.
- Trump's followers are lobotomized like an invasion of body snatchers, clapping for him whether he advocates war or peace with no critical thought.
- The response from his supporters is pure guttural rage, not rational thought from any realistic part of the brain.