Episode 237 · The Ben Avery Era
#237 - Buy The Dip | The Tim Dillon Show
Jan 31, 2021 · 1:12:17 · 514,000 views · 24 segments, 161 moments indexed
This week Tim talks Wall Street vs Retail Investors, where he is moving next, a new app with tech overlords called Clubhouse, and why Tim will hold the line through the week.
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- 4 min
GameStop Mania and Elizabeth Warren's Fake Concern
#Tim recaps the GameStop/AMC short squeeze saga, mocks Elizabeth Warren's warnings about 'market instability,' and argues the elite don't want ordinary people to make money.
9moments
- You can't get a good scam going in this country anymore—and it's not even a scam.
- GameStop and AMC stock surge as day traders buy in a free market, forcing hedge funds to cover shorts.
- Elizabeth Warren calls GameStop swings 'casino-like' and warns of market instability while claiming to fight for regular people.
- Politicians don't want you to make money—they want you vaccinated and earning slave wages, nothing more.
- Robin Hood app halted selling when GameStop hit $400, stopping retail traders mid-squeeze.
- Warren promises another dollar an hour and fake health insurance while keeping you out of the game with the big boys.
- Tim advises holding these stocks and pushing back against regulators who will introduce new restrictions.
- Hedge fund managers like Leon Cooperman cry on CNBC claiming they care while markets have been ending badly for Americans for forty years.
- The market chaos will end badly for hedge funds—for the first time in forty years instead of always the regular people.
Elizabeth WarrenAMCRobinhoodGameStopLeon CoopermanElon MuskDave Portnoy
- 3 min
Hedge Fund Guys Crying on CNBC
#He riffs on Leon Cooperman and other hedge fund managers tearing up on television, framing it as fake concern for the little guy while their money gets threatened.
7moments
- The wealthy don't want ordinary people in the Hamptons or at their country clubs.
- Hedge fund managers are literally crying on CNBC about retail investors buying stocks on Robinhood.
- They claim they're upset about market fundamentals, but they manipulate prices constantly themselves.
- Tim's analogy: hedge fund guys crying about retail traders is like strangers getting upset when you win money on a scratch-off.
- Instead of lying about market catastrophe, CNBC hosts should just admit they're working on the next pandemic.
- Tim joins Clubhouse, an invite-only audio chat app where entrepreneurs and venture capitalists network.
- Michael Gruen, a Bitcoin entrepreneur who owns the Sway House TikTok collective, sponsored Tim on Clubhouse.
- 6 min
Clubhouse: Meeting the Tech Oligarchs Who'll Run the Future
#Tim describes joining the invite-only app Clubhouse and listening to VCs, tech titans, and entrepreneurs casually discuss a future of endless pandemics, permanent lockdowns, and digital control, comparing it to slaves eavesdropping on their masters.
8moments
- Tim compares meeting tech oligarchs on Clubhouse to getting shackled in a barn where slaves can ask questions to their masters about tomorrow's field work.
- One Clubhouse speaker predicts pandemics every five years, masks forever, and that everyone must stay online using tech apps because the world has fundamentally changed.
- Tech leaders discuss a digital-only future presented as inevitable, cold and calculated, with no emotional consideration for what they're imposing.
- Tim lays out the enforcement mechanism: if you get deleted from these platforms, there's nowhere else to go because they control all the infrastructure.
- Eric Weinstein is an ally against this tech oligarchy, a genuinely brilliant guy, but Tim doubts he can win because the other side appears competent and organized.
- On Clubhouse, Tim functions as a jester brought out to make jokes while tech leaders discuss literal shackles—now made from elastic polymer so people feel free while being snapped back.
- There is no end to the pandemic in sight and never will be, not because of conspiracy but because this is how tech billionaires make their money and will remake society.
- These billionaires will present themselves as saviors while ushering humanity into an era where people cannot leave home or speak freely, all framed as being for the greater good.
- 4 min
The Coming Vaccine Fashion Line and Autonomous Drone Cities
#He extends the Clubhouse riff into a vision of endless vaccine 'seasons,' social credit scores, drone delivery, smart appliances listening to everything, and total surveillance branded as being 'for your own good.'
7moments
- Finance guys openly admit they're robbing you, but tech people wrap exploitation in utopian language about creating a new world.
- Someone influential told Tim we need guardrails online, and another claimed pandemics will hit every five years, forcing permanent remote work and digital-only friendships.
- Vaccines are coming as a fashion line—twelve different ones, seasonal like fashion week, eventually Gucci will make them.
- Public health and tech policy will fuse together, creating a cartel of mandatory companies while social credit scores determine if you're a team player or anti-social.
- Autonomous drone cities are being designed where everything gets delivered to you, monitored by cameras and listening devices, with every appliance tracking what you say.
- Social credit scoring will continuously move the goalposts on what counts as anti-social to keep people compliant.
- Art is already dead; the future will be nothing but TikTok dancing and sponsored content, including mandatory vaccine propaganda in Marvel movies.
tech peopleCNBCsocial credit scoressmart appliances
- 2 min
Tim reads a ShipStation sponsorship, pitching the shipping software's discounts and 60-day free trial for online sellers.
3moments
- Tim notes that new strains mean a lot of orders coming in and voters you'll need to ship out fast.
- He suggests that if you're not making money in the market right now, you might as well start selling your stuff online.
- Tim explains that small businesses can access the same shipping rates usually reserved for Fortune 500 companies through ShipStation.
- 4 min
An ad for Sheath underwear spirals into speculation about founder Robert Patron's shadowy military/intelligence background, Edward Snowden leaks, and Tim insisting none of it matters because the underwear is good.
11moments
- Sheath underwear has a flexible pillowcase for your junk and is all he wears now.
- Tim encourages listeners to research the inventor Robert Patron and his interesting, somewhat inspiring story.
- Patron served in the military, which Tim finds pretty cool.
- Tim refuses to relitigate what happened overseas or ask uncomfortable questions about Patron's military service.
- Some of Patron's activities were leaked by Edward Snowden, but Tim says it doesn't matter.
- Tim insists he's sure Patron did everything on the up and up, just maybe threw beers with Blackwater guys and raised a little hell.
- The company kept paying him to promote them even after his previous ad read because they appreciate comedy and are fans of it.
- Tim speculates the underwear may or may not be run by a genocidal maniac like Colonel Kurtz from Apocalypse Now, but it doesn't matter.
- Women and children can carry bombs and be just as devastating as regular soldiers, so they have to go.
- Tim questions whether Patron locked Chelsea Manning in a cell, but says it's not his business since Manning ratted.
- Patron and his guys had a couple beers, took guns, and fired into a crowd to keep people on their toes.
Sheath UnderwearChelsea ManningEdward SnowdenBlackwaterRobert Patton
- 4 min
Pregnant People, TERFs, and the Cult of Tech True Believers
#Tim discusses language policing ('pregnant people'), argues the Clubhouse tech elite are true believers in a cult-like utopian vision rather than cynical grifters, and connects it to owning nothing and being happy.
10moments
- Twitter enforces 'pregnant people' instead of 'pregnant women' language, threatening account suspension for saying a man can't get pregnant.
- Tim describes the messaging around gender ideology as a disease that has spread irreversibly, like a doctor diagnosing a terminal condition.
- Tech True Believers genuinely think they're helping you; it's a cult with a specific vision of how the world should look, not a cynical scheme.
- The endgame laid out in tech circles is total control: no car ownership, no house ownership, eventual control over what goes into your own body.
- Tim finds it darkly amusing to listen to his supposed captors explain exactly how they plan to control people's lives.
- Pay attention to what tech elites and politicians are openly saying about the future instead of watching fiction like Ozark.
- Elizabeth Warren wants you to thank her for blocking your financial opportunities and prosperity.
- Clubhouse rooms are full of wealthy early-20-somethings who started hedge funds as children and are connected to power.
- Tim wants to befriend the people planning to control society so they might occasionally let him out of the metaphorical cage to perform.
- Friend Alex keeps jumping into Clubhouse rooms uninvited and won't stop talking, which ruins Tim's attempts to network with the powerful.
- 3 min
Alex Ruins Clubhouse and Moving to Austin
#He complains about a friend named Alex who keeps barging into Clubhouse rooms, then pivots into announcing the show is relocating from California to Austin, Texas due to cost of living and taxes.
8moments
- Tim explains he sometimes gets let into Clubhouse rooms despite not being Joe Rogan, who reportedly turned down the platform.
- Some Clubhouse rooms are getting weird in ways that will prove interesting going forward.
- Tim's aunt is unhappy with the direction of the show, though he's unsure what specifically upset her.
- Tim announces they're moving to Austin, Texas and leaving their current location.
- Every smart person and YouTuber he talks to is leaving California because of costs, taxes, and lack of things to do.
- Being in Clubhouse makes Tim anxious that he could wake up tomorrow with no career after saying something objectionable.
- Moving to a cheaper state lets him live simpler, make content, and do live shows until the inevitable industry shutdown.
- Tim jokes about hoping to get a five-year run and eventually holding live shows where vaccinated audiences can sit and listen to people speak.
- 3 min
Billionaires Need to Believe They're Good People
#Tim explores the cognitive dissonance of ultra-wealthy tech figures who need to see themselves as forces for good, obsessing over not being 'mean' while inequality grows.
7moments
- Tech billionaires are obsessed with believing they're good people despite their wealth and the inequality around them.
- Tim describes the cognitive dissonance of having a billion dollars while others lack basic necessities, then claiming to be a force for good.
- School monitor analogy: a principal shows up to a failing school in a Bentley with gold teeth while teachers buy their own supplies and kids are on lunch assistance programs.
- Kids making fun of each other in the hallway—basic, low-level comedy that happens naturally among friends of different backgrounds.
- The principal shuts down the joking immediately, demanding they go to class instead of having a normal moment between periods.
- Tim points out the hypocrisy: the school is crumbling, teachers are overworked, parents are on opioids, yet the principal won't allow kids a simple moment of levity.
- The principal returns to their mansion, sleeps on expensive sheets, and tells themselves they fought the good fight that day.
- 5 min
The Hall Monitor in a Rolls Royce Analogy
#An extended analogy comparing tech billionaires to a wealthy hall monitor showing up at a crumbling, underfunded school and punishing kids for joking around instead of fixing the actual poverty around them.
8moments
- Tim compares tech censors to hall monitors in a crumbling school telling everyone they can't have fun.
- The parental monitor logic: if kids could make their own decisions, they'd have a Rolls Royce instead of being broke.
- Destroying someone's actual life to protect against a phantom metaphorical situation that hasn't happened.
- There is a movement in tech that doesn't want to control people and there are good guys in the CIA who don't want to overthrow elected governments.
- You can't commit actual crimes online like organizing a mob to kill someone, but there's a huge gray area beyond that.
- Tim on choosing your demons: you gotta pick which ones you like better because demons run everything in this world.
- Bill Gates versus Sheldon Adelson: at least Adelson owned a casino and let you go have fun before killing you.
- Peter Thiel, a gay unwoke Silicon Valley guy, might align better with freedom interests than the blue-haired tech crowd.
Bill GatesPeter ThielSheldon AdelsonWhitney WebbCIAventure capital
- 5 min
Choosing Your Demons: Peter Thiel vs. the Blue-Haired Tech Elite
#Tim argues you can't escape powerful demons running the world so you might as well pick ones you prefer, name-checking Peter Thiel, Eric Weinstein, Whitney Webb, Bill Gates, and Sheldon Adelson.
8moments
- Successful white women in tech are scarier than billionaires, especially ones pushing marginalized voices and content moderation.
- Tim falls asleep listening to podcasts of white women wanting him in jail while they talk about infrastructure and cleansing voices.
- People getting screwed for 40 years—wages stagnant, health care gone, colleges unaffordable, communities hollowed out, everyone on heroin.
- California is like Marlboro Lights: every year things get worse and more expensive, the government keeps raising prices and people pay.
- Can't screw people for 40 years and expect no rebellions—some go QAnon, some use Parler, some try to make money in the stock market.
- Tim bought AMC stock at $8.98 and is holding the line against Wall Street.
- The Whitney Cummings podcast went long, so they missed having the Wall Street Bets CEO on, though apparently he was excommunicated from the community anyway.
- California feels like the house after the party—cigarettes everywhere, it smells dank, you just want to leave and get eggs and coffee somewhere else.
Whitney CummingsAMCWall Street Bets
- 2 min
The Terrifying Successful White Woman
#He riffs on the archetype of the aggrieved, wealthy white woman tech executive who talks about elevating marginalized voices while endorsing 'guardrails' and worse.
6moments
- Tim loathes Austin—it's full of 40-year-old failed musicians scooping ice cream stoned at 3 p.m., dressed like toddlers.
- He doesn't love anything he doesn't also hate; all his friendships contain something lovable and something objectionable.
- Tim's complaint about Ben: he loves him but Ben isn't good at golf, and Tim claims he could be the greatest golfer in the world if he put his mind to it.
- Bit about quitting comedy to dominate professional golf, winning at Augusta with the crowd roaring his name in khakis and a polo shirt.
- A boring golfer came over; he just sits outside wanting to watch the ball go in the hole, loves Jesus and Trump.
- Golfers have to be good at something—they just want to watch the ball go into the hole, and Tim gets it because they're obsessed with that one thing.
- 6 min
Checking Stock Positions Live with Ben
#Tim and Ben check real-time prices on AMC, GameStop, and Nokia, joke about Robinhood halting trades, and riff on 'holding the line' as populist revenge against the market.
12moments
- Tim is up on AMC and discussing the strategy of buying the dips.
- GameStop is doing okay at $320, debating whether to buy now or wait for a dip.
- Ben has been secretly trading stocks for three weeks without telling Tim, wanting to leave the show.
- Tim describes Ben hearing him talk for hours and imagining stabbing him in the throat.
- Ben thinks he's going to retire in Austin with his family, but he'll actually have to keep working.
- The CEO of Robinhood is Ghislaine Maxwell's son, Tim reveals on Twitter.
- The resemblance between the Robinhood CEO and Maxwell's family makes the conspiracy believable, though probably not true.
- Ghislaine Maxwell is in prison—does Tim think she's trading stocks from there on the phone?
- Tim wants to participate in a populist revolution against the rich by buying meme stocks.
- Ben explains Dogecoin went up 800 percent after Elon Musk tweeted about Bitcoin and added it to his bio.
- Elon Musk is leading a populist charge on Bitcoin despite not understanding poverty himself.
- Facebook and Robinhood are the same—they trick you into thinking you're the customer when you're actually the product and your data is the commodity.
FacebookRobinhoodElon MuskBitcoinGameStopAMCGhislaine MaxwellDogecoin+6 more
- 2 min
Robinhood's CEO is Ghislaine Maxwell's Son (a Joke)
#Tim claims to have 'discovered' that Robinhood's CEO is secretly Ghislaine Maxwell's son, riffing on the resemblance while insisting it's true because he cares about the audience.
5moments
- Citadel owns all of Robinhood's trading data and uses it to frontrun retail customers' orders.
- Robinhood's billionaire founder's true loyalty is to the institutions that own the app, not to his customers.
- If you trace corruption up the chain far enough, you eventually find someone in the woods wearing a goat mask.
- When powerful people don't understand questions about market manipulation, you just show them photos with Jeffrey Epstein and they suddenly get concerned about market stability.
- Hedge fund guys tell whistleblowers that the pressure will end eventually, just like a bully threatening his victim when the older brother isn't around.
- 1 min
Robinhood and Citadel Selling Your Data
#He explains how Robinhood's real business model is selling trading data to firms like Citadel rather than serving retail customers.
2moments
- Tim describes how Citadel intimidates competitors: a figure in a goat mask and cloak threatens to either shut down training on securities or roast them on a barbecue spit at a seance in the woods.
- The threatened executive agrees immediately because he knows how Citadel operates.
- 1 min
The Bully Will Catch You Eventually
#A short bit about how the Reddit/WallStreetBets crowd will eventually get caught by the system once the moment passes, likened to a bully waiting for you without your older brother around.
1moment
- Tim notes that Russians poison their enemies because they know people have long memories over there.
- 2 min
Back to back ad reads for Lucy nicotine gum/lozenges and Hawthorne personal care products, with promo codes for both.
4moments
- Lucy nicotine gum and lozenges founded by Caltech scientists as a cleaner alternative to smoking and vaping.
- Tim pitches the product as letting you avoid being "like this," constantly vaping, with the option to use nicotine casually instead.
- Lucy subscription comes monthly to your door and helps support the show while getting you off nicotine.
- Hawthorne is a premium personal care brand that tailors products based on a quiz about your lifestyle and preferences.
- 2 min
Back to back ad reads for Lucy nicotine gum/lozenges and Hawthorne personal care products, with promo codes for both.
4moments
- Lucy nicotine gum and lozenges founded by Caltech scientists as a cleaner alternative to smoking and vaping.
- Tim pitches the product as letting you avoid being "like this," constantly vaping, with the option to use nicotine casually instead.
- Lucy subscription comes monthly to your door and helps support the show while getting you off nicotine.
- Hawthorne is a premium personal care brand that tailors products based on a quiz about your lifestyle and preferences.
- 1 min
Clubhouse Comedy Show and Entrepreneur Culture
#Tim talks about doing a fake financial seminar and a stand-up set on Clubhouse, and mocks the app's culture of self-described 'entrepreneurs' pitching themselves.
5moments
- Tim's best friends on Clubhouse are venture capitalists and children who started hedge funds at seven years old.
- There's a term for tech people who haven't made it yet: entrepreneurs.
- Some Clubhouse users act like they're running into old acquaintances with awkward, forced greetings.
- Occasionally a person gets on Clubhouse asking about microchips in vaccines, and the hosts dismiss it while describing the exact conspiracy.
- Tim does fake financial seminars on Clubhouse with Ben.
Clubhouseventure capitalentrepreneurs
- 2 min
Echo Chambers, Not Conspiracies
#He argues that what looks like a top-down conspiracy is really just insulated elite echo chambers reinforcing consensus, making the situation more hopeless because there's no single thing to unravel.
6moments
- Tim finds it fascinating to listen to how tech titans and oligarchs actually think, since they're usually discussed in shadows.
- It's not a conspiracy—Silicon Valley and finance operate through echo chambers and consensus-building with social pressure, not top-down coordination.
- These gifted, intelligent, driven people want to be good but don't know how, having spent their entire lives brutally committed to themselves.
- Tim didn't become a funny comedian by feeding the poor for ten years; he focused on his craft, and that's how wealth gets built.
- Rich people thrust into the spotlight want to help but can't give away all their money, so instead they demand everyone be nicer to them.
- They insist you consider people's emotional state and mental health, so you can't really say anything without being hurtful.
tech titansSilicon Valley
- 5 min
De-Platformed Dad and the Peasants Who'd Listen to the King
#A long bit imagining families 'de-platforming' each other, then extending into a medieval analogy about peasants who'd eagerly listen to the king and queen plan their exploitation, tying back to how impressed he is by Clubhouse people's ability to articulate the coming shackles.
10moments
- Kids de-platforming their father at the dinner table for giving unwanted advice about weight loss.
- Tim on the cognitive dissonance of successful entrepreneurs who must also be altruistic and focused on ending racism and cruelty.
- Preventing someone from being called 'stumpy' is prioritized over actually getting them a knee operation they need.
- Everyone's been lovely to someone dying of cancer who shaved their head, which is somehow more important than the cancer itself.
- We've created a fake hybrid world through technology that makes us feel like good people while all our real problems get worse every day.
- The internet offers safety where nobody will be mean to you or say the wrong thing, as long as you say what they want you to say.
- You're not dealing with one group of nefarious elites—you're dealing with many different cartels of people who all want you, dad.
- If peasants could hear the king—if they knew what the lord planned to do to them tomorrow—they would listen and even like him.
- Even though the king and queen are killing and destroying the peasants, the peasants would sit at the tavern impressed by how well they articulate the shackles they'll live in.
- Tim is impressed by their ability to clearly articulate the shackles people will be forced to live in for the rest of their days.
- 3 min
Rolling Quarantines and the New Normal of Surveillance Apps
#Tim predicts a future of endless rolling quarantines, apps replacing gatherings, and total behavioral monitoring justified as care.
8moments
- Tim predicts pandemics are now permanent — rolling quarantines and new strains coming constantly.
- China's partying while Americans drive through windows trying to get burritos during lockdown.
- The show is leaving California for Texas as soon as possible.
- People quarantined anywhere will want to leave — quarantine makes you crave escape and change.
- Rolling quarantines and pandemics are coming, complete with new apps and surveillance.
- Get vaccinated, order Chili's to your home, stay on the app — gatherings of three or more now count as domestic terror.
- Everything you say and do will be monitored, your data sold to companies that market targeted ads back to you.
- If you don't accept this system, authorities can simply get rid of you — and nobody knows what happens after.
- 3 min
The Green Souffle Future and Elliot Page Worship
#He imagines a future where people eat flavored nutrient souffles instead of food, forced to celebrate figures like Elliot Page, with 'buy the dip' jokes applied to celebrity comebacks.
6moments
- Elliott Page will tell you green powder delivered to your house is sufficient food, and you'll call him brave while eating it.
- Future food will be a green souffle made from powder and water, eaten daily except holidays when real food makes you bloated and regretful.
- The souffle comes in 30 flavors, but complaining about that selection makes people angry at you.
- Tim describes a gay souffle with special coloring meant to honor Elliott Page's bravery, while people scream at anyone wanting a steak instead.
- Everyone in Hollywood will be non-binary within five years as a career strategy, dipping and rising like a stock.
- Elliott Page should be bought on the dip because the comeback trajectory follows predictable patterns.
- 3 min
Closing Riff: Transitioning to a Woman to Survive Cancel Culture
#Tim closes by describing the overwhelming corporate/media forces aligned against dissenters, joking he'll have to transition and talk like an Alexa-voiced Silicon Valley executive to keep his show, ending on the idea that everyone everywhere secretly just wants to be a slave.
6moments
- Tim on the powerful forces united against comedians and the resources they marshal daily.
- Being beaten down constantly by corporate attack until a purple soufflé arrives via drone to numb you.
- An AI moderator asks permission to remove negative people from your chat and you agree.
- Guys like Tim will seem crazier every year, so everyone will have to go along with the program.
- Tim claims he'll have to transition to a woman just to keep doing the show.
- Silicon Valley's realization: everyone everywhere, regardless of identity, truly wants to be a slave forever.
Silicon ValleyElliott