ad · moment 11 of 26
Manscaped Ad and Zoom Meeting Masturbation Bit
from #194 - We're Going Home | The Tim Dillon Show · #194
5 min
SponsorManscaped
Tim reads the Manscaped ad for the Lawnmower 3.0 trimmer with a discount code, then drifts into a riff about jerking off during work Zoom meetings and pretending things are normal.
- Manscaped ad: engineers spent 18 months crafting the perfect ball hair trimmer, now released as Lawnmower 3.0 with ceramic blade and skin-safe technology.
- Tim uses Manscaped personally and recommends it; applies equally to women with surgically-created penises or anyone with excessive pubic hair.
- Story: friend's mother, a prostitute, advised young Tim and his friend to treat themselves well—don't get girls pregnant, just masturbate instead.
- Tim imagines using the Lawnmower 3.0 during work Zoom meetings while shaving genitals for an hour and a half.
- Zoom meetings for work are surreal: everyone acts normal discussing marketing numbers while society potentially collapses.
- Tim references his wife calling during existential panic—he considered not letting her in his house because he's in survival mode about providing for his kids.
- The absurdity of post-masturbation Zoom calls: covered in semen, forced to face former coworkers who are equally covered in their own ejaculate while discussing business.