rant · moment 26 of 26
Tim's Long Island Campaign Platform: Smoking, DWI Laws, and 9/11 Hate Crime Pass
from #180 - History Hyenas | The Tim Dillon Show · #180
2 min
Continuing the mock-campaign bit, Tim proposes absurd Long Island policies: legalizing smoking in bars, a new DWI test based on saying your name clearly, one free nonviolent hate crime on 9/11, and declaring the LIRR a lawless zone.
- Tim's Long Island campaign platform includes a nonviolent hate crime pass on 9/11—you can rip off someone's hijab or spray a swastika on a McDonald's without consequence.
- New DWI law: if you can state your full name and it matches your ID, you're not too drunk to drive.
- On the Long Island Rail Road, there are no laws—when the doors close, it's back to the Coliseum and ancient Rome.
- Tim plugs upcoming tour dates in Austin, Toronto, Minneapolis, Arizona, and Vancouver.