rant · moment 10 of 20

Marriott Courtyard, Bistro To Go, and Faking Paraplegia for Room Service

from 156 - Some Of Our Faves · #156

5 min

A rant about the decline of hotel quality, the death of real room service in favor of 'Bistro to go,' and a story about lying about being a paraplegic to force a hotel to deliver food to his room.

In this bit10 moments
  • Tim stayed at the Marriott Courtyard and explains why Marriott hotels used to be the gold standard because they were run by clean, disciplined Mormons.
  • The Marriott used to have a nice breakfast buffet that Tim went to on Sundays with his mother.
  • Instead of real restaurants and room service, Marriott now has Bistro to Go—a glorified Starbucks partnership where preheated food arrives in a box like you're in a border detention center.
  • Tim on what he actually wants in a hotel: a real restaurant, a nice buffet, and an angry efficient Asian woman chef making omelets—not a glorified Starbucks.
  • Tim ordered room service at a hotel and they said to pick it up at the desk, not bring it to his room.
  • Tim screamed into the phone that he was a paraplegic to force the hotel to bring room service to his room.
  • When room service arrived, Tim opened the door, made eye contact with the delivery person, grabbed the food, said "now what I'm cured," and shut the door.
  • Tim ties hotel service demands to demanding conviction of child rapists as part of standing up for service and pride.
  • Marriott Courtyard on a road trip didn't have free coffee in the lobby—just a Starbucks where you have to pay.
  • Starbucks has invaded everything, including hospital ERs with drive-throughs.
Mentioned here

StarbucksMarriottMormonshotel room serviceHoliday Inn

All 20 moments in this episode →