rant · moment 9 of 21
Local News Coverage of the Chase
from 146 - Small Town Girl · #146
4 min
Tim mocks the incompetent, script-dependent local Fox 11 anchors narrating the chase, comparing the real chase unfavorably to their cutting away to the Empire finale featuring Jussie Smollett.
- News anchors shouldn't exist unless there's a script in front of them.
- During the chase, anchors run out of things to say and start apologizing to producers for not talking enough.
- Everyone watching wants a dramatic resolution—cops getting shot in the legs so they can retire on three-quarters pension.
- News outlets try to create a narrative about whether the girlfriend is being held hostage or staying willingly in the car.
- People on Twitter and Facebook live-comment debating whether the woman should escape the vehicle.
- A newscast anchor discusses how she would feel fearful in that situation, and Tim hopes she gets kidnapped for real.
- Cops could have stopped the chase hours earlier with a pit maneuver, but they get cautious about endangering the woman.
- LAPD suddenly discovered God and won't risk injuring the woman, so instead they endanger the entire Los Angeles metropolitan area for three hours.