rant · moment 10 of 11
Dogs Don't Belong at Restaurants
from They Come & Go | The Tim Dillon Show #347 · #347
14 min
Tim rants at length about new rules allowing dogs in restaurant outdoor spaces, fake service animals, the indignity imposed on other diners, and pivots into an extended riff on the lost dignity of eating alone.
- Tim argues the US government has made a mistake blessing dogs in restaurant outdoor spaces.
- Service dog certifications are fake and everyone knows it, including people who claim doctor's notes.
- People trying to eat shouldn't have to deal with strangers' dogs; leave them at home.
- At a Tribeca restaurant, a dog was tied to a chair under the table without being fed.
- After 9/11 everyone got a dog, which was fine, but things have escalated from there.
- An outdoor restaurant is still a restaurant, regardless of having no roof.
- A Pakistani Uber driver said they have many dogs in Pakistan—and they don't have names.
- Dogs should fly on a plane once in their life, when their owner moves, not constantly.
- People act like having a dog at a restaurant isn't an imposition, ignoring that everyone bringing one would ruin the experience.
- Tim insists there is dignity in being alone at a restaurant without a pet as emotional crutch.
- Nobody is ever alone anymore due to phones, adopted pets, and group chats constantly intruding.
- Couples bringing dogs to restaurants should be turned away; only lonely people deserve sympathy for needing one.
- An older woman eating alone with a glass of chardonnay demonstrates real dignity, even if anorexic.
- A portly man eating alone at a bar with the bartender shares pleasantries and dignity, unlike someone with a dog.
- Eating alone requires knowing how to do it properly, as seen in New York City restaurants.
- Eating alone in New York is a religion; people watch the restaurant dynamics unfold quietly.
- The dogs don't want to be at restaurants either; they are being dragged against their will.
Meghan MarkleSaint Bernard