rant · moment 18 of 23

The Holiday "Show Us How Bad You Have It" Contest

from Free SBF | The Tim Dillon Show #327 · #327

5 min

Tim launches an elaborate fake charity contest asking listeners to submit videos proving their lives are miserable enough to win $500, escalating into increasingly absurd and dark submission ideas.

In this bit9 moments
  • Tim launches a contest called "Show Us How Bad You Have It" where people submit videos proving their suffering to win money.
  • He requests footage of people getting beat up, asking for evidence of violence in applicants' lives.
  • Hospital-bound family members should be filmed and submitted as proof of hardship.
  • Tim wants to see people on all fours eating cat food to qualify for the contest.
  • He demands footage of caregiving situations with terminal illness, specifically requesting scenes of incontinence captured on camera.
  • The judging standard: submissions winners are determined by which ones the judges cannot watch in full because they're too disturbing.
  • Tim describes an example submission involving a skeletal baby with "the Bony disease" that applicants should match in terms of disturbing visual content.
  • He rejects student loans as qualifying hardship but accepts night terrors where people wake up with knives and run around the house.
  • Winners receive five hundred dollars after taxes, with Tim joking that the show will use his tax rate rather than the winners' rates.
Mentioned here

Sam Bankman-Fried

All 23 moments in this episode →