rant · moment 9 of 25

LA Weekly Hookers and Getting Robbed by a Pimp

from Bobby Kelly | The Tim Dillon Show #322 · #322

4 min

Tim tells stories about hiring sex workers via LA Weekly ads in the past, comparing scams in LA versus New York, and recounts a tense encounter where a pimp with a gun confronted him, ending in a bizarre forced dance/masturbation scene.

In this bit9 moments
  • Tim used to find hookers through the LA Weekly classifieds in the back, where the pictures never matched reality.
  • The girl in the ad would be blonde, but a Spanish woman in her 50s with zits would show up instead.
  • LA sex workers were consistently worse than New York's, where there was at least some kind of code that got you what you paid for.
  • Tim showed up to a hotel where the worker said they couldn't touch each other, just get naked while he masturbated—effectively the same as being alone in his room.
  • Tim describes what sex work in Austin would probably be like: a woman who smells like brisket with burnt brisket ends as pasties, bikey tattoos, ashy elbows, and green hair.
  • Tim almost got shot when a pimp came to his hotel room with a gun after Tim complained about being sent the wrong girl.
  • After Tim complained to the service, they sent the girl back up—and her attitude was terrible, so was his.
  • Tim made her dance while he masturbated in front of her because he wanted to get his money's worth after the bad service.
  • The whole experience was the worst: she was doing angry pissed-off dancing while he was angry jerking off.
Mentioned here

New YorkAustinLA Weekly

All 25 moments in this episode →