rant · moment 19 of 19
Would Rather My Kid Be a Hawk Than a Teacher
from Baby's Gotta Go | The Tim Dillon Show #339 · #339
3 min
Tim concludes he won't support banning TikTok, joking he'd rather his kid identify as a mentally ill hawk with millions of followers than become a teacher, and imagines a sad eulogy for a kid who died before her video went viral.
- Tim reconsiders his position on banning TikTok after seeing the damage it causes, though he ultimately leans against a ban because people make a living on it.
- He'd rather his kid be a hawk than a teacher, comparing the two as if being a predatory bird were preferable to an educator.
- Tim describes his ideal TikTok kid: mentally ill, filing her teeth down, passing out on the app, smashing gallons of milk, and accumulating five million followers.
- Countries are now fighting each other by targeting youth through apps, with kids spreading dangerous content globally in pursuit of virality and fame.
- The promise of virality corrupts kids and creates a bad value system, replacing solid foundations parents might try to build.
- Kids dying from dangerous TikTok challenges before seeing their follower count represents the saddest consequence of the platform's impact.
- Tim delivers a eulogy joke: she died before she knew she was trending, before the hawk flew away.