rant · moment 14 of 22
Walking Off the Indigenous Tour With Mick the Guide
from #297 - The Lodge From Hell | The Tim Dillon Show · #297
5 min
Tim and Ben recount ditching a guided tour led by a tour guide named Mick who lectured about genocide and indigenous history at 8am, and Tim rants about tour guides being "damned" people forced into hacky routines.
- Tim and his group hadn't had coffee before being asked to participate in an indigenous ceremony with three white dudes.
- Tim knew they'd leave the tour immediately after seeing other tourists in shorts and Safari hats on the bus.
- He wanted a private tour and didn't want to be grouped with the Australian Disney couples who were sexless and earnest.
- Tim expresses hatred for tourists who expect to learn something meaningful from an eight-minute or half-day tour.
- Tour guide Mick was a damned person forced to tell hacky jokes while discussing genocide and stolen indigenous children.
- When a tour guide's joke bombs after discussing genocide, Tim wishes the driver would blow his brains out on the windshield.
- Mick combined discussing historical atrocities with claiming a community center as redemption, mixing gravity with corny punchlines.
- Ben discovered the Guugu Yimithirr hunted Chinese people for cannibalistic feasting, information Mick never mentioned on the tour.