rant · moment 3 of 22
Ray's Junk Food COVID Diet
from #281 - Hewlett Harbor Holiday | The Tim Dillon Show · #281
2 min
Tim reads through the absurd list of comfort foods Ray requested (mac and cheese, PB&J, jar sauce) and jokes that this diet would make someone sicker, not better.
- Tim reads his friend Ray's grocery list for COVID patients: lentil soup, mac and cheese, peanut butter and jelly, pasta, eggs, canned coffee.
- Tim will stock Ray's cupboards so the sick guests can destroy his home while recovering.
- Tim invokes Colin Powell's Iraq doctrine—'if you break it, you own it'—to explain his responsibility for guests who test positive.
- Once guests test positive, Tim has to confine them to a room, attic, basement, panic room, or kennel for seven to fifteen days.
- The grocery list is anti-healing food—the exact diet someone would eat if they wanted to stay sick with COVID, not recover from it.
- Tim notes Ray specified 'jar sauce,' implying Ray didn't trust him to cook homemade sauce for the sick guests.