rant · moment 12 of 24

Fantasy: Biden Tortures Celebrities at the Ritz-Carlton

from #272 - Night of The Beating | The Tim Dillon Show · #272

4 min

An extended bit imagining Joe Biden kidnapping and torturing Shakira, Elton John, Ringo Starr, and Swedish House Mafia at a Ritz-Carlton to recover hidden wealth, framed as a joke he'd win reelection for.

In this bit6 moments
  • Tim's fantasy: Joe Biden commandeers the Ritz-Carlton and tortures celebrities like Shakira, Elton John, and Julio Iglesias to extract their wealth.
  • If Biden actually tortured Shakira, he'd win reelection because people would support it.
  • Tim would phone bank for Kamala Harris if she locked up Swedish House Mafia in a Montage in Laguna Beach and tortured them for their money.
  • Saudi Arabia actually detained nearly 400 powerful people, including princes and tycoons, at the Ritz-Carlton in November 2017 in what became known as the Purge.
  • An American version would have torturers interrogating Swedish House Mafia about how they make so much money from music they don't understand.
  • Tim imagines putting Ringo Starr on the rack and telling him he was the least talented Beatle, which the torturers genuinely don't understand.
Mentioned here

Kamala HarrisSaudi ArabiaJoe BidenRitz-CarltonRingo StarrShakiraJulio Iglesias

All 24 moments in this episode →