rant · moment 6 of 30
Austin Is a Tax Scam With Bad Barbecue
from #251 - Dirty Little Animals (ft. Ray Kump) | The Tim Dillon Show · #251
4 min
Tim trashes Austin as an overrated dump full of bad bars and country line dancing, then goes on an extended riff about barbecue restaurants looking like FEMA tents or abortion consultation offices, and the absurdity of waiting in line for Franklin BBQ.
- Tim describes Austin as a tax scam he's glad to be part of.
- Comparing Austin to talking up the Cayman Islands—people don't care about the food or water, they care about money laundering.
- Austin is a dump; the audiences are bad and the city is five to seven blocks of disgusting bars with heroin addicts playing guitars.
- Austin is Williamsburg Brooklyn with country line dancing, and the entire city smells like pulled pork from mesquite trees.
- People get used to eating pounds of meat, coleslaw, potato salad, macaroni and cheese, baked beans, and quarts of sweet tea.
- Barbecue restaurants look like homeless shelters or FEMA tents, or worse—like abortion consultation waiting rooms.
- Tim predicts barbecue restaurants will eventually have someone getting fed pulled pork while being assaulted on a trash can.
- People stand in massive lines for barbecue like it's a Disney World ride, except the ride is brisket.
- Tim won't eat off a garbage can lid and just wants to sit down, eat, and leave—barbecue as a cuisine can't do anything interesting.
AustinFranklin BBQJeffrey EpsteinWilliamsburg, BrooklynGhislaine MaxwellCayman Islands