Hawthorne Cologne Quiz for Horrific Faces

• 25:18Hawthorne's quiz tells you which two colognes are best for you, one for work and one for play.
• 25:46Tim describes the target customer: someone with a face that looks rubbed against a brick wall.
• 26:27The quiz doesn't ask hard questions like discussing imperialism—it asks simpler things about your appearance.
• 26:57Quiz question: when you look in the mirror, do you wish you're a different person or want to die?
• 27:15The quiz also asks what you smell like: a sad gym teacher who drinks too much or a cabbie rotting in a car.
• 27:37Tim lists facial conditions the quiz covers: boils, lesions, pimples, blisters, open wounds, leathery neck skin.
• 28:27Rate your face on a scale between crumbling brick wall and sunken boat.
• 28:43Rate your skin between a victim on the first 48 who's starting to turn and a Dick Tracy villain.
• 29:02Hawthorne.com—spelled h-a-w-t-h-o-r-n-e with an e—offers 10 percent off with code tim.
• 29:25Tim corrects himself on the website spelling, saying it's hawthorne.co, not .com.

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