rant · moment 3 of 19
Why Nobody Should Throw a Party in Their Mid-30s
from #208 - Let's Have A Party | The Tim Dillon Show · #208
6 min
After a friend suggests he throw a desert party, Tim rants about how gatherings of people in their 30s are anxiety-ridden nightmares full of political talking points, arguing people's addiction to socializing (not masks) is the real problem.
- Tim rented a house in the desert for two months at 110 degrees, noting the only things that survive there are gays, Jews, and tarantulas.
- A friend suggested he throw a party, prompting the question: what party would be appropriate for a 35-year-old in the current climate?
- Parties in your mid-30s are a nightmare of anxiety-ridden people armed with statistics like cable news anchors trying to impose their views.
- If mid-30s partygoers are actually hammered and dancing, it means they're on the brink and about to drive into a school bus.
- The alternative is weird anxious jockeying for position as guests feel each other out about what they've accomplished with their lives.
- The real problem is people's disgusting need to be in groups all the time instead of being alone—that's impoverishing the country.
- He paid to rent a desert house to be alone and die quietly, not to have people in his backyard talking about anarchists in the streets.
- Nobody in this country can be alone for five seconds, which is why coronavirus spreads everywhere because everybody has to be in large groups.
- On the phone you can escape by saying you need to shower, but if guests are at your property, the entire process of getting them in and out is a nightmare.
- Tim mimes the exhausting cycle of fake engagement with departing guests asking what you were saying about cops and racism.