rant · moment 7 of 25
Christmas Message: Put Your Animals Down
from #177 - Sober December | The Tim Dillon Show · #177
3 min
Continuing the pet bit as his 'holiday message,' he tells listeners to euthanize their pets before family visits and stop making animals their whole identity, while disclaiming he loves animals really.
- Tim's Christmas advice: put your dogs and cats to sleep before hosting family, especially if your house isn't impressive enough to mask pet odors.
- Dogs and cats don't actually love you—they just want food, and they become a burden when you're struggling financially.
- People paying others to watch their animals while they're away is proof that pet ownership has become an excuse to be irresponsible.
- If you can't afford professional pet care and have to pawn your animals off on friends and family, you should put them down instead.
- Tim describes the absurdist comedy of inserting a Ridge Wallet ad right after joking about smothering children.
- The actual point: too many people own pets, and the trend has gotten completely out of control.