rant · moment 20 of 20
The Waitress's Tragic Future (Heroin Fantasy)
from 155 - Death By Chocolate · #155
4 min
Tim spins a dark, extended fictional narrative imagining the waitress's future spiral into addiction and death, framing his $8 tip as silent pity rather than honesty.
- Tim describes his strategy for infiltrating extremist groups: have them disavow, then eat vegan banana pancakes while saying 'Heil Hitler.'
- Tim tipped the waitress eight dollars on a thirty-five dollar bill because he felt bad for her, recognizing she's working hard but doing a horrible job.
- The waitress is living in LA under the impression that someone will eventually give a shit about her band, get her on a reality show, or book her for ten grand a night in Atlantic City.
- Tim lays out what will probably actually happen to the waitress: she'll age, the tattoos will make less sense as she gets into heroin, eventually shooting it because it's more cost-effective.
- The waitress will squat in friends' houses until they get arrested, lose her diner job, sleep in an abandoned car, and sell her body on the street.
- Tim imagines the waitress's final moment: businessmen dump loads in her after shooting her up, she feels the heroin running through her veins and wonders what Wednesday night she'll meet God.
- The waitress will eventually know that years ago a fat guy saw all of this happening but chose to give her eight dollars instead of telling her the truth.