rant · moment 3 of 22
Barb, the Chubby Kids, and Uncle Rick With No Tongue
from 154 - The 3 AM Episode · #154
6 min
He recalls his friend's mother Barb calling them disgusting chubby kids while they ate pizza, her cop brother-in-law's insults, and a downstairs neighbor named Uncle Rick who had half a tongue.
- Barb, his friend's mother, would greet them with 'hello boys' while smoking Barbados cigarettes and sitting in a lazy boy with her husband.
- Tim describes Barb's brutal honesty about him and his friend: 'you boys are disgusting two chubby kids eating pizza drinking lactaid.'
- The older cop brother would sexually harass them in the basement, which Barb would shut down by saying 'language' while the boys kept eating.
- Tim reflects on how he and his friends got brutalized growing up, but it was funny in retrospect because the insults were just accurate observations.
- Another friend's mother was a high-priced call girl who had different names throughout her life, all ending in 'i'—Tony, Brandy, Toni.
- This woman drove Tim and her daughter to a head shop in eighth grade while hammered, chugging what might have been Jäger or blackberry schnapps.
Barbbarbecue chicken pizza