rant · moment 3 of 13
Godiva's Broken Syrup Machine at Mohegan Sun
from How Did We Lose This Country · #104
Audio-only archive episode — no video to seek.
4 minTim recounts working Mohegan Sun casino shows, the rundown crowd of amputees and oxygen-tank gamblers, and a chaotic scene at the Godiva store where staff struggle to get syrup out of a jammed dispenser for his parfait.
- 7:03Comedy shows at Mohegan Sun in Connecticut draw crowds of chain-smoking amputees, obese people on scooters, and elderly Asian tour groups—the crud on the bottom of the universe's pocketbook.
- 7:27Tim visits Godiva between Saturday shows after seeing their advertised parfait, discovers they now make soft-serve ice cream and shakes.
- 7:52Soft-serve operations at upscale chocolate shops are a disaster—the process is loud, messy, with whipped cream flying everywhere and half-empty milk containers in back.
- 8:30Tim requests chocolate syrup in his berry parfait; staff say the syrup is stuck in the container and start banging the vat against the wall.
- 8:58Employee repeatedly bangs the syrup vat while another staff member suggests running it under hot water and offering to put her fingers in to loosen it.
- 9:16Meanwhile, other Godiva employees on the floor try to maintain their classy chocolate shop presentation while banging and struggling with the syrup in the background.
- 9:37The Godiva parfait cup turns out to be too small; Tim requests his money back, and staff confirm many customers complain about the size.
- 10:03Godiva is the American version of a real chocolatier, unlike proper chocolate shops like Mizan in New York City.
- 10:14All the Swiss chocolate companies are Nazis from the Bund, hiding gold and making truffles while concealing Holocaust connections.