rant · moment 12 of 19

Seating Tim at Dinner: Morgue Stories, Phlebotomy, and Adoption Jokes

from This Is No Way To Live · #72

Audio-only archive episode — no video to seek.

4 min

Riff continues on what makes Tim good dinner party company (morgue stories, biting), a bit about a lawyer telling Tim to add an iPad puppet to his act, and a bit about wanting to adopt/kidnap a child.

In this bit6 moments
  • 42:42Tim's stepmother's father spent an hour telling him to put an iPad in his act and talk to it like a puppet.
  • 43:30The imagined heckle of a pre-programmed iPad calling the audience fat.
  • 44:01Tim says he wants to adopt a kid with someone or seed a woman together to become a father.
  • 44:14Kidnapping as an alternative to adoption, which leads to a tangent about whether kidnapped kids can have good homes.
  • 45:05Blood work came back great except slightly elevated liver enzymes and fatty liver, which Tim's doctor attributed to being fat.
  • 45:28A doctor's phone call during Tim's blood draw: someone discussing a cancer patient with a year to live and whether a feeding tube would help quality of life.
Mentioned here

fatty liverSupreme Court

All 19 moments in this episode →