Episode 44 · The GaS Digital / Ray Kump Era
Farting Down The River
May 9, 2017 · 1:04:54 · 12 segments, 96 moments indexed
- 1 min
Music intro and applause for the show with the tagline about billionaires, dictators, and CEOs.
2moments
- 0:14Tim's show premise: taking a hard critical look at society's most hated people — billionaires, dictators, CEOs — while ironically thanking God for them.
- 0:33Tim admits he has no rant prepared and nothing to say as he's starting the episode.
- 2 min
Considering a More Expensive, Smaller Room With a Window
#Tim admits he has no rant prepared and discusses whether to pay $100 more for a smaller Brooklyn room that actually has a window, reflecting on how this compares to his life expectations at 18 and 27.
5moments
- 1:06Tim lives in a windowless room and has a chance to spend $100 more per month for a room half the size but with a window.
- 1:38At 33, deciding whether to downsize for a window is the saddest life decision Tim could imagine.
- 1:52Tim reflects that at 18 he didn't see himself in this situation, but by 27 this would have been the best case scenario.
- 2:14During spring and fall when it's 70 degrees, the building management keeps windows open and Tim's balls are melting to the sheets.
- 2:30The only problem with moving to the smaller room is he won't have space for his adjustable weights.
- 3 min
San Antonio: The Nothing City of Conventions and Barbecue
#Tim recounts his week doing shows in San Antonio, describing it as a soulless convention town full of chain restaurants, a fake river walk mall, and mediocre barbecue that he insists is overrated everywhere.
5moments
- 3:08Tim just got back from San Antonio, which he describes as a nothing place where people are detached and corporate with no real culture.
- 3:39San Antonio's economy runs on conventions—dental associations, corporate events—and a shitty man-made Riverwalk that functions as a big mall.
- 3:56A podcast fan at the show told Tim none of his friends like it because they all do their own thing, noting that podcast fans tend to be people who live alone.
- 5:00Tim's take on barbecue: it all tastes the same, like eating a Duraflame log, and he doesn't care about the tradition.
- 5:20All smoked food is trash and tastes identical everywhere—brisket, potato salad, the whole thing is the same shit no matter where you go.
BarbecueSan AntonioNew York StateMargaritavilleTexas Dental Association
- 5 min
Chili Rellenos Challenge, Fat People's Menus, and the Alamo
#He riffs on his own supposed chili relleno skill and a fantasy cooking battle, mocks absurd modern menu items like salted caramel banana cream pancakes, and mocks the Alamo tourist experience including the moved location and Riverwalk buffet culture.
8moments
- 6:00Tim argues that if regional food was truly amazing, New York's trillion-dollar economy would have replicated it already.
- 6:45Uber drivers pretending barbecue terminology matters while failing at their actual job.
- 7:52Tim proposes a live competition where his homemade chili rellenos challenge Mexican restaurants, but predicts no one will show up.
- 8:42The end of the American empire manifests as rampant commercialism and corporate chain restaurants with absurd menu items.
- 9:01Salted caramel banana cream pancakes exemplify how chain restaurant menus no longer make culinary sense.
- 9:30Fat people don't care about flavor profiles—they want more cheese, more whipped cream, and maximum portion size.
- 9:53San Diego survives entirely on massive portions: three-pound cinnamon buns, chicken fried steaks the size of a head, burritos like luggage.
- 10:14Fat people eat massive meals, smoke cigarettes, then take boat tours where guides point out a Hyatt from 1991.
True DetectiveBobby KellyDenny'sSalt LakeSan DiegoStarbucksHyattTwo Brothers Barbecue+1 more
- 8 min
San Antonio Comedy Club Grind and the Langoliers Comparison
#Tim describes the low-turnout comedy club gig in a mall, comparing San Antonio's disorienting emptiness to Stephen King's The Langoliers, then muses about comedians submitting to Comedy Central's half hour and the delusion that life is a fair contest.
15moments
- 10:38The Alamo moved a block away and Tim didn't bother going inside because of the line.
- 10:59Tim doesn't care about the Alamo because too many people died there.
- 11:29Tim treats historical tragedies like Pearl Harbor with indifference if he has other things to do.
- 11:43Tim considers whether the Alamo might be a false flag operation.
- 12:05Dallas conventions moved to cheaper San Antonio because Dallas got too expensive.
- 12:38The San Antonio Comedy Club sits on the third floor of a mall with broken escalators and one hard-to-find elevator.
- 13:19Tim compares San Antonio's nothingness to Stephen King's The Langoliers, a movie about a plane landing in a tasteless, echofree version of the past.
- 14:05San Antonio feels like people walking around an outdoor mall confused, with no culture holding it together.
- 15:01People from San Antonio look confused when asked where they're from, as if they don't realize they're in San Antonio.
- 15:21Dragging information out of San Antonio residents confirms nobody has a strong opinion about the city.
- 15:46A 40-year-old feature comedian selling beer koozies at a mall comedy club for 15 people is what comedy looks like outside major markets.
- 16:18Comedy Central gets 400 half-hour submissions from people in major cities with real chances, but also from people doing comedy for the first time.
- 16:47People submit tapes for specials without questioning if they're good enough, driven by the belief that life is a contest to be won.
- 17:32Tim argues that some people get opportunities without putting in years of backbreaking work, and nothing evens out in the end.
- 18:18Tim notes that the guys who did 9-11 didn't get away with it, transitioning to upcoming 9-11 material.
San AntonioThe AlamoThe LangoliersComedy CentralDavy Crockett
- 4 min
The $20 Blowjob Offer From a San Antonio Sex Worker
#Tim tells a story about being propositioned by a sex worker outside his hotel, haggling mentally over the $20 price, declining, and giving her $2 instead, spiraling into a graphic riff about AIDS revenge fantasies.
7moments
- 18:59San Antonio is a pointless city worth a few more minutes of discussion.
- 19:26Tim is propositioned by a sex worker on the street who offers to blow him for twenty dollars.
- 20:19She tells him the price is twenty bucks, and Tim price-checks a blowjob like it's groceries.
- 20:42Tim declines because he felt like it would make him a bad person, then gives her two dollars instead.
- 21:23Ray points out that by rejecting the deal, Tim may have devalued her asking price for future customers.
- 22:05Tim spirals into a bit imagining the sex worker has AIDS and is trying to deliberately infect him with a syringe during the act.
- 22:26The bit concludes with Tim describing getting bitten and infected in an alley by a bodega, then asking if he can sue.
- 9 min
Introducing Philip Marshall and the Barry Seal/CIA Connection
#Tim sets up the Philip Marshall conspiracy story, tracing his career as pilot for CIA-linked drug smuggler Barry Seal, his ties to Noriega and the Medellin cartel, and his authorship of 9/11 conspiracy books alleging Saudi-trained hijacker pilots.
10moments
- 22:44Tim has been on a Philip Marshall kick, noting younger audiences come to the show for conspiracy content they can't find elsewhere anymore.
- 23:02Everything is now filtered through hyper-political lenses, making it impossible to have fun discussions without people assuming your political alignment.
- 23:44Philip Marshall was Barry Seal's private plane pilot—Seal was a CIA-connected drug runner who flew for the Medellín Cartel and was involved in Iran-Contra.
- 26:41Marshall, a trained pilot himself, wrote books arguing that untrained pilots could not have performed the 9/11 maneuvers, finding the official account improbable.
- 27:08The alleged hijacker pilots supposedly executed 360-degree corkscrew maneuvers for no apparent reason, which only made sense if approaching from a specific reinforced angle.
- 27:53Marshall wrote a fiction book called Lakefront Airport about his time in New Orleans with Barry Seal, then followed with The Big Bamboozle and other works.
- 29:37The Big Bamboozle thesis: Marshall argues these pilots had to be highly trained government agents who received their training at Piniel Air Park in Marana, Arizona.
- 30:41Piniel Air Park in Marana, Arizona has been a CIA front—various companies have used it as a boneyard for old planes.
- 31:13Marshall analyzes in his book why it's completely improbable that untrained pilots could execute these maneuvers without advanced training.
- 31:40You don't need to believe 9/11 was an inside job to recognize the full story hasn't been told—declassified 28 pages revealed Saudi funding connections to the hijackers.
Barry SealPhilip Marshall9/11Medellin CartelManuel NoriegaPablo EscobarIran-Contra affairPineal Air Park
- 8 min
The Murder-Suicide Theory and the Suspicious Cleanup Crew
#Tim details the official story that Marshall killed his two teenage kids and dog before killing himself, questioning the missing laptop, the reported black SUVs, and the oddly fast professional cleanup, while asking listeners to call in with tips about Calaveras County.
11moments
- 32:32Marshall claims the 9/11 pilots received training in the United States and asserts this was a Saudi operation possibly with U.S. intelligence cooperation.
- 33:11Instructors reported the pilots didn't want to learn how to land, which Marshall identifies as incredibly suspect.
- 33:45Someone living near Marshall in Calaveras County messaged a message board saying Tim's group doesn't even know the half of it.
- 34:27Marshall kills himself, his children, and the family dog; authorities quickly conclude murder-suicide.
- 35:14Marshall's laptop computer was missing from the house, and neighbors reported seeing black SUVs unlike local police cleaning up the scene.
- 35:57The dog being killed is the key detail—no one shoots their dog in a suicide; you kill the dog so it doesn't bark.
- 36:26Marshall was supposedly working on a big story, which fits the pattern of journalists who die under suspicious circumstances.
- 36:56The Saudis could have killed Marshall to prevent him from damaging their diplomatic relationship with the United States.
- 37:43Marshall's contacts with the Medellin Cartel and subsequent cartels, combined with Bush family involvement in the drug trade, could have made him a liability.
- 38:35Tim puts out a call for neighbors of Philip Marshall to contact the show with information about the death, inviting anonymous tips via social media and email.
- 39:42Tim considers paying for himself and Raymond to travel to Calaveras County to investigate the case, though he acknowledges it's not a great idea.
Philip MarshallBush familyMarshallMedellin CartelMujahideenCalaveras CountySaudi governmentMichael Hastings
- 13 min
He and the crew read aloud from the news report detailing the ballistics, toxicology, and threatening voicemails Marshall left his ex-wife, debating whether the official murder-suicide account holds up.
15moments
- 39:46Tim refuses to go to Calaveras County, imagining being attacked at the airport gate.
- 40:28Marshall supposedly found something at Pineal Airpark that would unravel something, but his laptop disappeared.
- 40:53Tim wants Wayne Madsen on the show and describes him as someone who alleges Obama was having gay affairs and smoking crack.
- 41:27Wayne Madsen makes documentaries on people's front lawns accusing them of murder while neighbors walk their dogs confused.
- 42:20Tim brings up witnesses claiming a professional cleanup crew arrived immediately after the deaths.
- 43:09It's possible the guy killed his kids, but it's weird—domestic violence cases usually show prior warning signs.
- 44:29Tim questions why teenagers would both sleep on a couch together instead of in their own rooms.
- 45:10The report shows Philip Marshall had painkillers, morphine, and antidepressants in his system.
- 46:03Detectives claimed it took two seconds to shoot each victim, proving one could wake up before the other was shot.
- 47:03Marshall left threatening messages: 'If you don't call me, mom is gonna have problems. We don't want this.'
- 48:57A conspiracy video claims Marshall was a former airline pilot and contract pilot for black ops who wrote about Saudi Arabian intelligence and 9/11.
- 50:54Tim questions why police allowed professional cleaners into the home while still investigating a supposed suicide.
- 51:53Who hired the professional cleaning crew when the father is dead and the kids are dead and the mother is out of the country?
- 52:24Tim recalls working at a morgue and hearing stories about how wives would tell them to get out before the scene was cleaned.
- 52:36Returning to Wayne Madsen for further analysis of the Philip Marshall case.
Philip MarshallWayne MadsenCalaveras County
- 7 min
Watching Alex Jones and Wayne Madsen Cover the Marshall Case
#Tim and Ray watch and react to an Infowars segment featuring Wayne Madsen discussing Marshall's black-ops background and Barry Seal's ties to George H.W. Bush, mocking Madsen's conspiracy-world reputation and Alex Jones's role as a front man.
9moments
- 54:08Tim identifies Alex Jones as the frontman for conspiracy researchers like Wayne Madsen, who struggle to articulate their findings.
- 54:22Why would someone with wealth and a comfortable life risk it all to investigate obscure murders instead of enjoying their success?
- 55:05The system is designed to punish people who investigate government conspiracies, which is why most people avoid the work.
- 55:47Tim argues it's important to know whether Phil Marshall was killed by the government before going to work at Cinnabon.
- 56:15The Marriott breakfast buffet in San Antonio treats customers like human beings with omelet stations and waffle bars.
- 56:38Staff at quality buffets pour your coffee and keep you seated because they know if you stand up you might leave and stop eating.
- 57:09Tim recommends diving into the Philip Marshall rabbit hole on YouTube, including a low-budget film called 'Unthinkable' about an airline captain.
- 58:55Conspiracy rabbit holes are fun to get into initially but marginalize you and take a dark psychological toll over time.
- 59:10Next episode features Wendy Starling discussing the sex business with consenting adults in New York City.
Phil MarshallMarriottBarry SealGeorge H. W. BushAlex JonesUnthinkableHofstra
- 5 min
The Marriott Breakfast Buffet and the Unthinkable Marshall Movie
#Tim praises the hospitality of Marriott breakfast buffets, then plugs a low-budget fictional film called Unthinkable based on the Marshall story, watching and mocking a clip of its poor production quality.
8moments
- 59:47Tim pitches aiming higher for guests by going after Jackie Chan and Channing Tatum instead of David Icke.
- 1:00:01Tim asks if anyone knows about Philip Marshall and who might have killed him.
- 1:02:05Tim's take: Philip Marshall probably snapped and did it himself, but he was onto something.
- 1:02:25Marshall was murdered because he wasn't subscribing to and sharing podcasts he listened to for free.
- 1:02:56The hosts examine photos of Philip Marshall's dead children and discuss their appearance.
- 1:03:36Tim expresses confusion about why the show isn't famous given what they do every episode.
- 1:04:01Tim urges listeners to make their mothers listen to the show as a Mother's Day gift.
- 1:04:23Tim mentions he'll be at Skankfest in June and is still figuring out live podcast plans.
- 1 min
Wishlist Guests: David Icke, Channing Tatum, and Final Verdict on Marshall
#Tim jokes about trying to book guests like David Icke and fantasizes about interviewing Channing Tatum inappropriately, then wraps up the Marshall case by polling Shannon and Ray on whether they think he was murdered or did it himself.
1moment
- 1:04:33Tim asks who someone is and learns it's a girl who tried to blow him