rant · moment 7 of 18

Parmesan Overload and the Heroin-Ritual Comparison

from Pizza Hut Buffet · #32

Audio-only archive episode — no video to seek.

3 min

They watch the regular woman dump excessive parmesan and salt on her pizza and lay out paper towels in anticipation, leading Tim into a riff comparing buffet rituals to cooking heroin on a spoon and other addict behaviors.

In this bit8 moments
  • 17:49Tim describes a woman's routine at the buffet as something she probably does several times a week, with an air of practiced comfort and no hesitation.
  • 18:08Tim complains about losing half an hour because his mother was in the hospital, which set back his buffet schedule.
  • 18:37Tim admits he's never been a big ranch guy and doesn't understand putting it on oily pepperoni pizza.
  • 19:36Tim criticizes conservatives for opposing the right to end your own life peacefully while simultaneously bleeding people dry with healthcare costs.
  • 20:01The woman at the buffet has been hitting the pizza heavily with fresh parmesan for about ten minutes straight.
  • 20:17Tim compares her parmesan application to being heavy-handed, noting she just dumped salt all over her slice.
  • 20:40Each table has a full roll of Bounty paper towels, which Tim has only seen before at picnics and southern barbecues.
  • 20:52The woman laid out the paper towels in anticipation of what's about to happen from all that parmesan and grease.
Mentioned here

Neil GorsuchAntonin ScaliaHarriet Meyers

All 18 moments in this episode →