rant · moment 11 of 21
Hire My Disgusting Friends
from Tech People & Celebrating Nothing | The Tim Dillon Show #423 · #423
6 min
A long comic rant demanding that tech companies hire his 'dirtbag,' 'disgusting' friends — meth heads, ex-cons, community college dropouts — instead of importing foreign engineers, skewering Vivek's 'mediocrity' comments and the Cory/Urkel/Screech references.
- Tim argues that if politicians poisoned the country with food and destroyed families, they should hire his dirtbag friends as engineers anyway.
- The list of reasons why his friends are damaged: inhaled asbestos, ate lead paint chips, joined youth gangs, were raped by authority figures, ate chalupas a lot.
- Tim insists his friend Ryan, currently in prison for meth, should get hired at Apple when he gets out — otherwise, why have a country?
- Politicians should walk into a Waffle House and tell everyone they now work at Google.
- Vivek Ramaswamy's take on American culture venerating mediocrity over excellence, citing TV shows like Saved by the Bell.
- Tech culture needs more Whiplash, fewer Friends reruns; more math tutoring, fewer sleepovers; more science competitions, fewer cartoons.
- Tim's question: why hire more Indians if they didn't come to America early or fight in its wars like the Civil War?
- Tim understands the push for math competitions but sees Ramaswamy's real message: Americans aren't up to the task, we need to import people.
- No sleepovers is a strange policy that will be a problem for the tech movement from the inside.
- An Indian guy lecturing Americans that they can't be hired and more Chinese people are needed — wasn't that exactly what people voted against in Trump?
- Tim notes the new administration is copying the Democratic playbook that Americans are stupid and can't do anything, so bring in other people.
- Tim concludes: this is a big issue.
Donald TrumpKamala HarrisVivek RamaswamyAnn CoulterTucker CarlsonGoogleAppleZac EfronWhiplash