ad · moment 12 of 22
Hawthorne Skincare and Irish Skin Problems
from #193 - Fun Easter Foods | The Tim Dillon Show · #193
4 min
SponsorHawthorne
Tim transitions into an ad for Hawthorne, riffing extensively on his blotchy Irish skin and stereotypes about Irish people before describing Hawthorne's personalized skincare/cologne quiz and giving the promo code.
- Tim explains why he needs people like Luis Gomez right now—they'll give you a ladder that breaks while you're dying, but it feels nicer.
- Irish skin is grotesque—red, scaly, blotchy—and no amount of weight loss or gain fixes it.
- Tim's emotions literally bubble up on his face as red dots because of his translucent Irish skin.
- He started using Hawthorne skincare, which has cleansers, deodorant, shampoo, and body wash made without drugstore chemicals.
- Tim was never a cologne guy but now likes cologne, and Hawthorne's personalized approach appealed to him.
- Hawthorne asks about your skin type, hair, work, climate, and lifestyle to tailor products specifically to you.
- If he told Hawthorne he's a gay drug addict sober ten years who bought a foreclosed house and lives in the underground economy with a schizophrenic mother, they'd still tailor something for him.
- Store brands like Cetaphil pump billions of gallons of generic gloop at everyone—Hawthorne offers a personal relationship instead.
- After just starting Hawthorne, his skin already feels lighter, more hydrated, and moisturized.