rant · moment 4 of 16
Being the Fat Vicious Kid and Finding Your Social Tier
from 163 - How To Be Popular · #163
6 min
Tim recounts his own high school arc from friendless outcast to homecoming king nominee, describing the archetype of the mean, funny fat kid who keeps everyone on their toes, and lays out how to identify the popular tiers and befriend marginal 'in' figures like the rich kid or the horse-faced athlete girl to break into a group.
- Tim describes being the fat vicious kid in school—mean and funny enough to avoid getting bullied.
- The fat vicious kid launches preemptive attacks before others can shred him, and schools need those people.
- Popular kids keep the fat vicious kid around because he's clever and isn't a threat to their status.
- Tim's own ninth-grade experience: he sat alone at a table with other silent outcasts, isolated but not pitied.
- By tenth grade Tim made friends, eleventh grade he had a group, and twelfth grade he got nominated for homecoming king.
- If you're not popular and you're relatively stable, it's your fault—not because you're inferior, but because you're not trying.
- Smart people can outsmart their way into a social circle using manipulation and social arbitrage instead of giving up.
- There's no value in holding onto the identity of being misunderstood or weird if it drives everyone away.
- The strategy: identify the social hierarchy, then befriend the person who doesn't belong in the popular group.
- Rich kids aren't cool initially but always become cool by junior or senior year as they grow into their wealth and throw parties.
- Work your way into the circle of someone marginal or someone who doesn't belong, not the top tier directly.
Catholic high school